


Redemption

by gimmekensei



Category: Bleach
Genre: Adult Content, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Consensual Underage Sex, Dark Past, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Minor Character Death, One True Pairing, Protectiveness, Slow Burn, Students, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:34:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25017844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gimmekensei/pseuds/gimmekensei
Summary: The Captain of the Ninth had heard the rumors floating around that there was a student at the Shinigami Academy with a tattoo that perfectly resembled his and who made it no secret that he planned on joining the Ninth. Due to curiosity, Kensei finds himself investing time in finding out more about the teenager and reaches the conclusion that Shuhei Hisagi possesses a hero complex in regard to him. Though Kensei should drop the subject, he finds himself stepping in and acting as a guardian of sorts. On the other hand, Shuhei doesn’t know at first how to react to find his hero standing right before him and offering to help him out. The original, one-sided perception he had of the Captain starts to change at the same time that Kensei starts to notice that there’s more to the teenager than meets the eye. But unknown forces are at hand and it’ll be impossible to walk away unscathed.Just how do these two attempt to stay afloat while feeling the red strings of fate pulling them closer?
Relationships: Hisagi Shuuhei/Muguruma Kensei
Comments: 54
Kudos: 69





	1. A New Beginning

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Start to Something New](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24998878) by [gimmekensei](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gimmekensei/pseuds/gimmekensei). 



> Just throwing it out there but Shuhei is 17 here. I used the underage tag for that reason. There'll be a little bit of steamy stuff in later chapters, but most of the smut will be when he's 18 and older.

“That’s Hisagi-san-” A girl uttered with a fangirlish squeal. She was pointing straight at a fellow student of theirs who was walking right across the yard to seemingly one of his classes. He had black hair that covered his grey eyes partly and a bandage covered part of his cheek. “The girls in my second-period class say that he went on a mission already! Heck, he might finish school sooner than us!”  
  
“Sssh! He’ll hear us!”  
  
“Oh, he definitely will.” Both girls jumped at the newcomer’s voice and whirled around to spot that Lieutenant Matsumoto was standing before them, hands on her hips as she eyed them both quietly. She didn’t seem annoyed but also wasn’t overly pleased either. “Let’s not gossip so much, alright girls?” Flicking her hair back, she flashed a new smile. “Now, run along! I’m sure you have classes!” She laughed, watching both Shinigami Academy students bow politely and hurryingly run off. A Lieutenant's appearance at the school would probably create more gossip than the presence of a certain teenager.  
  
“Hisagi, hmm?” She whispered softly, the words slipping from her lips with ease as she studied the very man that the girls had just been previously blushing and giggling about. He was a fine young man she supposed...he definitely was the one creating all the news around Soul Society. Failed the entrance exam twice and yet still showed up, accomplishing the third exam. The stubborn type that didn’t like to give up. Sort of reminded her of a certain someone...furthermore his academic grades and skills were similar to Kaien Shiba’s past at the school. Lieutenant Shiba was after all one of the few students from the academy that had finished within a few years, instead of the typical six years of school. Impressive to say the least.  
  
Relaxing her hands and wrapping her arms around her chest, she ignored the hushed whispers from the students walking behind her. Rather what she did truly notice was when Hisagi turned and locked his eyes on her. A sudden shiver ran down her spine, making her unconsciously swallow her own saliva. There was so much….pure passion and heat hidden behind those bangs of his. It felt as though his very eyes were driving into her. That gaze held her in place and boy oh boy...she now understood why those girls kept crushing on him. Such a lady killer those eyes were~  
  
Letting a breath finally free itself from her lungs, she flashed a forced, but polite nod before hurrying along. For a second she almost forgot why she was there in the first place, but as air rushed into her lungs again, she remembered she had been here for the purpose of business. Ugh, shame she always had to work. She did always prefer a bottle of sake over paperwork…  
  


* * *

  
“....You’re boring.” Shinji sighed and threw his head back, causing all his long hair to fly across before settling down across the back of the chair he resided in. Why he went out of his way to harass his fellow Captain and friend, he had no idea. But he was already regretting it. At least his lieutenant was more interesting than this…  
  
“Yeah, well...not all of us dump our workload on our Lieutenant's.” Kensei snarled between clenched teeth, scribbling his signature on just another report that had graced his desk. Shinji was really starting to get on his nerves. Couldn’t he just go mess with Rose instead?? Or hell, anyone was better than him. He had shit to do, not time to entertain.  
  
“You don’t because you know just as well as I do, that your Lieutenant can’t do a lick of paperwork.” Shinji retorted with a winning smirk and opened his fan, giving it a few flicks with his wrist to help cool him down. Damn the beating down heat.  
  
“Tch, she’s useful with other things.”  
  
“So you say.”  
  
“Don’t you have better things to do than getting on my nerves?!” Kensei finally growled, slamming a hand down onto the desk, and snapped his pen in two while he was at it.  
  
“Ah, jeez.” Shinji sighed once more and rubbed the back of his neck. “Always gotta be difficult. Look, I came by to tell you that there’s a student at the Academy that might be a good fit for your division in the future.”  
  
Kensei raised an eyebrow at that. “I don’t need more soul reapers. I’m already completely at full capacity. I’ve gotta house and feed most of them and you just expect me to take on a new soul reaper?”  
  
Ignoring the silver-haired Captain’s grumbling, Shinji just stood up. He brushed himself off before closing his fan and tapping the tip of it against the Captain’s desk. “Trust me, you’ll want him.”  
  
“Tch, if I get the name of this kid, you’ll get off my case?”  
  
“For now.”  
  
“Tch, spit it out.” Kensei bit out, and grabbed another pen that hopefully would last longer than the one before.  
  
“His name is Shuhei Hisagi, and believe me...you won’t regret crossing paths with him.”

* * *

  
Today was starting off strangely. First the typical girls and occasional guys talking about him behind his back. That Hisagi was used to. However, to have a notable Lieutenant at the school and further yet just staring at him...had been really bizarre. Besides the bandage on his face, was something on his face that was causing the increases in stares?  
  
Sighing, Shuhei ran his fingers through his hair, making a small face when his fingers caught on a tangle or two. He barely had time to get ready for the morning since he had accidentally slept in. That meant barely having enough time to dress, grab a bite to eat and skip brushing hair.  
  
Strolling off, Hisagi ducked in quietly to his next class, praying to god that his teacher wouldn’t notice his absence. This time he was lucky enough, but someone still caught a glance. But the passerby didn’t say anything and rather turned, letting his haori flutter behind him.  
  
“.....was that-” A girl mumbled under her breath, only for her friend to shake her own head. “No idiot, there’s no way there’s a Lieutenant and a Captain here in the same day!”  
  
“But I swear, that was the Captain of the Ninth!”  
  
“Enough! Let’s go to class, okay??”

* * *

Why did life have to keep kicking his ass? Dragging his feet, Shuhei glared daggers into the floor but finally reached his teacher’s office. The only reason he was here was that he’d been told that there was something “important” to discuss. Important his ass. His grades were all As and he was killing it in everything else as well! What more was there to discuss??  
  
Knocking once on the door, he waited to hear, “Come in,” before opening it and politely bowing his head. At first, nothing seemed out of place, but the look of worry growing on his teacher’s face was well...concerning, to say the least.  
  
“Sensei?” Hisagi uttered quietly in order to break the silence in the room. This was just growing more and more awkward as time ticked by. He clenched his hands in front of him, grounding himself in that.  
  
“Hisagi...we have never truly discussed what you plan on doing after you finish here at the academy.” The teacher murmured quietly, eyeing his student for a moment before gesturing for the younger male to sit across from his desk. Hisagi did so, but seemed reluctant about it.  
  
“I want to join the Ninth division.”  
  
“Ah, yes...I’ve heard this.” Sighing quietly, the teacher tapped the tip of his pencil against the edge of the desk. “....Hisagi...a request was put in for you.”  
  
“Eh, a request?” Hisagi raised an eyebrow at that. Few students got one, and when they did they often weren’t heard from again since by then they had been claimed by a division. It was rare for such an accident to occur since it caused a great deal of trouble for the Captain who put in the request. Furthermore, for the chosen student it could cause trouble in his newly entered division. Many saw the act of a potential request as favoritism and many had been known to speculate cruel things, such as suggesting a requested student slept with a Captain or higher up for the chance. “Sensei, I meant it when I said I would get myself into the Ninth. Whatever request it is, I don’t want a part of it. I mean no disrespect, but this is my decision.”  
  
“Hisagi-” For what felt like the hundredth time that day, his teacher heavily sighed once more. “It’s a request from the Captain of the Ninth. He put in a request to meet up with you to discuss things...what to discuss he informed me was “none of my goddamn business.”  
  
“W-What, but how-”  
  
“Think of it as less as a request but more of an informal meet and greet. I presume that you’d be happy with this news, but Hisagi I beg you to think things carefully. Often my students come to the academy with a certain goal in mind, but things can happen that might change your opportunities or even what you wish for.”  
  
But Shuhei was barely listening. Everything being said was just going over his head as he stared holes into the ground, so utterly shocked that he’d gotten a request….a request from the Ninth. The Ninth he wanted to join...the Ninth commanded by Captain Muguruma. He’d been planning on just working hard to be the best student in all his classes so he had first pick into what division he wanted to try to apply to, but this...this was so much better. This was truly the chance he’d been waiting for unknowingly.  
  
“Hisagi, he’s here to pick you up.” Those words managed to stick unlike everything else and Hisagi’s head whirled up only for him to stiffen when he heard a curt knock at the door. The noise was coming from the very same door he had knocked at earlier.  
  
“Come on in please…” It was his teacher’s turn to stand up from behind his desk and bow politely before gesturing a hand at Shuhei Hisagi. “Captain Muguruma, here’s the student you requested to see…”  
  
“Yeah?” Kensei’s eyes locked on the wild bed of hair that belonged to the same skinny kid he had seen earlier hurrying to a class. So this was the kid Shinji had recommended? “I’ll take him off your hands for a bit.”  
  
“Captain Muguruma, he has a class in an hour-”  
  
“Then I’ve got an hour with him. Oi, kid. Come.” And though Hisagi’s teacher seemed nervous, Shuhei stood up and immediately turned to follow the Captain that already was making his way out of the office.  
  
_Shit, maybe dreams really did come true?_ _  
_

* * *

Ever the observant one, Hisagi didn’t utter a word as the Captain of the ninth gestured for him to sit down across from him in one of the many of the local shops surrounding the outskirts of Soul Society. Shuhei still didn’t fully understand the need for them to meet, considering he was still very much a student and would have at least 3 more years before he would need to start applying to divisions. But he wasn’t going to complain or behave in the same weak manner his teacher had shown. When the moment would come, Hisagi already knew exactly which division he would apply for.  
  
“Know what you want?” The Captain addressed him, breaking the younger male’s train of thought and though he didn’t mean to sound quite so snarky, he uttered under his breath, “I haven’t been here before, so there’s no way to know.”  
  
“Heh, I guess I’m so used to coming here religiously that I forget others don’t do the same.” The Captain didn’t seem perturbed at all and rather grabbed a paper with the listings of today’s choices, placing it right before the teenager. “They’ve got some good choices y’know. And before you give me that look, I’ll pay so don’t hold back.”  
  
Hisagi blanked at that, unsure just what to say to that. At that moment he couldn’t help but recall the time Hotaru had told him how whenever a guy on a date paid for her, she always felt like she owed him in some way and always tried to return the favor later in the future. Was the same sort of thing playing out here? But how does one return the favor when the person in question is a Captain who has everything at his disposal?  
  
“....just tea, please.”  
  
“Eh?” Kensei’s eyebrow rose at that before relaxing once more as he pushed the paper even closer, as if ordering the kid with his pushing that tea wasn’t good enough. “Just tea, huh? Didn’t take you for the kind that settles with that. At least getting something to munch along with it.”  
  
“What’s wrong with tea?” It was Hisagi’s turn to raise an eyebrow, but if anything he seemed to be judging far more than the Captain. “....something sweet.” He finally bit it out, looking annoyed that he was giving in so quickly to the Captain’s childish demands.  
  
“Heh, sweet tooth? Could have figured.” Kensei snickered, chuckling when the student just glared up at him. He liked this fiery kid. Hisagi didn’t hold back voicing how he felt, even in the presence of a superior and arguably someone that could destroy his future career if he so chose to do so.  
  
“....” Hisagi didn’t respond to that, rather preferring to stare right at the table separating them. His younger self would be squealing in delight at this entire interaction, but as much as he was just as excited as he had been back then, he had no idea just what to do. He couldn’t just spill his guts out and tell the Captain everything...that they shared the same tattoo, all because Shuhei convinced Aoga when he was in a drunken stupor to give it to him. It had hurt like a bitch to get, but getting it still had been worth it. He just hadn’t expected to actually meet the man it represented though. Just thinking about the tattoo made his face itch, but he let his hands settle into his lap under the table, fisting the fabric of his shihakushō. That was good enough, for now, to distract himself and keep that tugging feeling at bay.  
  
“Heard some things about you...y’know.” Kensei murmured, uttering thanks when the tea came, and though he hadn’t asked for it, the shopkeeper placed two yunomi (Japanese tea cups) before them. Well, he wasn’t going to complain, now was he? And as much as he had given Shuhei some crap for liking it, he might as well learn to get used to the bitter taste. Spotting the teapot, Hisagi sat up more straightly and reached for it since it was always important to pour for the higher ranks first, but the unheated glare Kensei tossed stopped him in his tracks. Hisagi watched uneasily as the Captain instead poured for them both. His brain was already starting to ache, knowing that the list of what he owed the Captain was growing even bigger by the minute.  
  
“....such as?”  
  
“You failed your first two entrance exams,” Kensei started to speak and watched as immediately the brat seemed to shut down, paling faintly as his hands fidgeted once more in his lap. Seemed that was a sore spot for the kid. “Oi, let me finish before freaking’ out. I’m not bashing you, actually impressed. It shows stubbornness and a strong will. That's the kind of shit I like to see in a good soul reaper. Heck, I’m obviously not the only one impressed considering they let you at that academy take on actual missions when you’re not even a part of Gotei 13.” He pointed that out in the hopes that Hisagi would just quit being so stiff, dammit...and loosen up. He wasn’t here to rip a new one, but rather he was here on a mission to better understand the teenager before him. He had heard the rumors of a certain 69 tattooed clad teenager stirring things up in the Shinigami Academy. A kid that was showing true abilities that if the other Captains saw...might try to recruit him.  
  
After he had first seen the kid in action in one of his classes, Kensei had gone around asking about the kid to whoever seemed to be capable of providing answers, and well, that first year Renji kid had been one of the many he had integrated. Renji had been a hard one to crack open, but from the gist of it, Shuhei had a mentor complex with him. By the very fact that he was covering up that tattoo that Kensei had yet to see but knew existed there, it just came to show that Shuhei wasn’t brave or proud enough to allow Kensei the grace of knowing.  
  
Strong-willed the kid might be and one of the best fighters he had seen coming from the academy in a while, but he still seemed to have hesitations in other fields. If Kensei went about this right, he’d break apart those chains that oh so clearly pinned Hisagi down and let the kid actually reach his true potential. The only way he could do that was to bring the kid under his wing and in essence, bring him into the Ninth division fold.   
  
“Yeah, well...it means nothing when they keep raising the price to attend and expect me to find enough scrapings to fulfill their requests.” Right as he spoke, Hisagi knew he had fucked up. Even Kazeshini knew since he wouldn’t stop crackling and making fun of his master, fully aware that speaking like this just showed that the teenager was nervous in the presence of someone he so highly respected. “But...you’ve probably heard about that already.”  
  
“Sort of. Heard you’ve been looking for work around Soul Society.” Kensei watched as Hisagi finally reached out, clasping his fingers around the warm cup and took a sip of his tea. He wasn’t to be fooled though. The brat was barely actually taking a sip. _So he was nervous, huh?_ “Look, the reason why I dragged you here,”  
  
“At least you know you ‘dragged’ me.” Shuhei cut in and once more looked about ready to beat himself up for his harshness of tone. “Pulled rank on my teacher and everything.” He added with an undertone of a grumble.  
  
“Oi, listen.” Kensei couldn’t help but snicker at that snarky comment. The kid had spunk and he definitely liked that. He really was just like a firecracker. If Mashiro ever had the chance to meet Hisagi, he bet the woman would see exactly why he was drawn to Hisagi so. And side note, fuck Shinji for always being so damn right. He liked this kid a lot. “I’ll cover the bills.” Easy enough for him to do. He didn't have a family to support and as a Captain, he made a good salary. It would be easy enough to fund his education.   
  
“....in return for what?” Hisagi whispered, eyes wide and hell, Kensei felt a strange beating in his chest at finally getting a clear view of those grey eyes. He wasn’t a poet, but man he really felt a strange tug to get lost in that cloudy gaze.  
  
“Nothing. Well, uh..” Kensei hesitated and couldn’t help but reach back to rub the back of his neck in an attempt to regain his bearings. “You plan on joining my division, right? It wouldn’t hurt to support my division’s future members.”  
  
“How-” Hisagi stuttered and nearly slammed his hands down on the table but he was stopped when their food came, his being what looked like a chocolate cookie and Kensei’s being an actual proper meal of tonkatsu. _(-note- tonkatsu is a Japanese deep-fried pork cutlet)_  
  
“You don’t exactly make it a secret that you plan on joining my division.” The Captain remarked as he grabbed himself a bite with his chopsticks. He would have offered the kid a bite since he looked so damn skinny, but from the pure look of bewilderment spreading across that youthful face, he figured another time would be better.  
  
“Y-You...know…”  
  
“About the tattoo, yeah. Why you got it though, I’ve got no idea.” Kensei remarked only to pause midbite when Shuhei looked hurt by his last comment. “Oi, kid I’m flattered. It’s a massive compliment, but I’m definitely not worth it.”  
  
“You are worth it.” The teenager cut in and looked up, letting their eyes lock for a few still seconds. He didn’t seem unsure from the steady set of his gaze. “I've always looked up to you, and you have my utmost respect.” Hisagi bit out only to rub his temples with his fingers, trying to ease the stress that was growing inside him. “You saved me when I was a kid in Rukongai. You said,”  
  
“You're alive. You should be happy...So smile.” Kensei added on. Everything made sense now. Everything was falling into place. This was that kid and hell, maybe that's why he'd been so compelled to track down who this Shuhei Hisagi was.  
  
“...you remember.” Hisagi whispered in awe, his very foundations shaken by the fact that the Captain had just repeated those very same words that had changed everything for him.  
  
“Course, I do kid.” Kensei chuckled and reached to cup Shuhei’s cheek. It wasn’t meant to be sexual in any way, merely aimed at soothing Hisagi’s nerves as he stroked the soft skin underneath his fingers with the back of his thumb. It was a bit of an awkward position with his arm so outstretched across the table, but that was the least of the Captain’s concerns. “I just didn’t connect the dots sooner, but I stand by what I said.”  
  
For the love of God, Shuhei was almost an adult, and yet he felt wet pricks forming in his eyes. Though he wanted to run away and cut himself open from how embarrassed he felt, the hand resting on his cheek held him momentarily in place. “Y..You have no idea how much those words affected me. I-I did whatever I had to do to get into the Academy. It’s stupid but I couldn’t stop thinking about you and I-f-fuck…” He started to stutter, but even with the uncertainty present in his voice, he didn’t pull away one bit, even as Kensei’s fingers brushed against the bandage hiding the tattoo from view. Hisagi knew that at any moment that the Captain’s fingernails might get caught on the bandage and free what was purposely hidden. The idea of baring it all to the Captain roused something deep within that made Kazeshini purr with delight. At least he and his zanpakuto were on the same page for a change.  
  
“You’re right here...you want me in your division and y-you want to support me? I-It’s unbelievable.”  
  
“Well, it’s the truth, best believe. No strings...nothing. I’ll support you until you can come home.”  
  
“H..Home?” Shuhei whispered, not even trusting his own voice now.  
  
“The Ninth. Where else?” Kensei chuckled before tapping a finger against the bandage. “Oi, do one thing for me kid.”  
  
And though Shuhei was trying to remind himself to quit being so pitiful and predictable, he choked out hoarsely, “Anything.”  
  
“No more hiding who you are. You chose to get this, so stand by it. You branded yourself with my mark, so let them see it. Everyone knows you've got it...the only person you're hiding it from is yourself. Now, I’ll never force you to join my division, but while you still want to join it, show it.” Kensei whispered, his food long forgotten including Shuhei’s snack paired with tea as Hisagi’s shaky gaze flickered up once more. The Captain had no idea how being this close affected him. This man was his hero and yet his image of the Captain was quickly evolving to something more dynamic and permanent.  
  
Swallowing anxiously, Shuhei covered the Captain’s larger hand with his, and with his silent urgency, he aided the male in pulling off the bandage to be thrown aside. “Perfect.” Kensei whispered, before finally breaking the closeness by pulling his body away to settle fully once more in his seat. “How’s it feel, huh?”  
  
“It feels…” Shuhei ran a finger down his cheek only for the corner of his lips to lift ever so slightly. “It feels freeing.”  
  
“Good. Don’t forget that feeling. Now hurry up and finish before that class you've got. Hate to fuck up that teacher of yours any further by making you late.” They both shared a grin at that before returning to what was at hand.   
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
“Staring into space, huh?”  
  
Shuhei yelped and nearly fell right off the large tree branch he had perched himself on. He had figured after all that getting a break from classes and taking a well-needed nap would be a good plan without any flaws. It had been at least a week since he had the meeting with the Captain of the Ninth...and man, just thinking about it sent shivers running down his spine. Heck, it sometimes even created butterflies in his stomach like he was some virgin thinking of their crush. So to then be minding his own business only to hear the familiar gruff voice that he could never just forget, sent his mind whirling.  
  
“Captain Muguruma! I didn’t see you-”  
  
“Figured from how you kept daydreaming.” Kensei snickered. Truth be told, he hadn’t been looking for the student but had been thinking about their previous encounter. Just as he had wrapped up on the particular thought, he had spotted said kid resting in the tree branches. Definitely not how he expected their next encounter.  
  
“I was just thinking.”  
  
“Oh, thinking's good I guess.” Kensei shrugged and ran a hand down his neck, messing up some of the short strands there. “You hiding from classes or somethin’?”  
  
“Of course not! I wouldn’t skip classes when-”  
  
“Easy. Just teasing.” Kensei chuckled at how skittish Shuhei really was before offering a fingerless gloved hand up. “You gonna keep talking down to me, huh? Hop on down.” A faint embarrassed flush crossed the teenager’s features before he reached out, letting their fingers tangle together as he dropped down onto the ground. The Captain released the kid’s grip on his hand and suddenly ruffled Hisagi’s hair. “You hungry, or somethin’?”  
  
“....is food going to be the excuse you use each time you want to see me?” Hisagi suddenly asked, making a small face at his hair getting all messy. He had just spent a good amount of time this morning trying to tame those hairs!  
  
“Eh?” Kensei crooked an eyebrow only to laugh and drop his hand to pat Shuhei’s shoulder once before letting it drop to his side. “Nah, but figured since you look like a stick bug and I’m starving, I could kill two birds with one stone.”  
  
“You…” Shuhei gapped at the remark only for his grey eyes to narrow. There again Kensei could see that fire kindling deep inside the kid’s soul. “Just described me as a stick bug?”  
  
“Need me to repeat it for good measure?” The Captain uttered tauntingly and flicked the teenager’s forehead with his finger. “Easy there. Gonna have wrinkles at a young age at this rate.”  
  
“Y-You...the nerve!” Shuhei stuttered and whacked the Captain’s hand away. All his nervousness was forgotten as he continued to bicker back with the older male, unaware that this had been the Captain’s plan the entire time to help him loosen up a bit. Tagging along and walking side by side, Kensei managed to switch the conversation to Hisagi’s classes. He couldn’t help but snicker at some of the commentary Hisagi made in regard to his fellow students, or about the mission he had just recently gone on. That made him think actually,  
  
“So they let you on missions, eh?” Kensei asked, glancing to the side to watch Shuhei before letting his eyes flicker back to the street ahead. Now approaching town, he was silently trying to figure out where the best place for them to eat in peace and quiet was. Not that the shops facing the streets didn’t have good food, but often he gained too much attention from being there.  
  
“Yeah, which is good right? At least that’s the conversation my headteacher and I always have.” Hisagi murmured only to pause when he spotted a fellow student of his. Hotaru seemed to be in the center of Soul Society for different reasons since she wasn’t passing through the various store stalls and rather seemed to be on a mission to head somewhere. Normally Shuhei would have raised a hand and called out, but he figured today he didn’t have to...she was probably perfectly fine and he could just check on her later at the dorms.  
  
“Oi, you listening?” Kensei broke Hisagi’s concentration with a ruff interruption.  
  
“Eh-” Shuhei stammered, looking like a deer in the headlights. It was almost adorable, but Kensei let that thought die as soon as it appeared. “I said you should continue with taking on the missions.”  
  
“You think so?” Hisagi cracked a faint smile. He still couldn’t quite believe he was just simply talking with his hero, current mentor, and future Captain.  
  
“Yeah, it’ll help toughen you up and gain some more experience. I can see if the academy would allow you to join some of the Ninth’s missions, but if you don’t want to-”  
  
“I want to!” He exclaimed, nearly jumping from the pure excitement that rushed through his veins. “I-I mean, if the opportunity arose I would greatly appreciate being considered for-”  
  
Kensei roared, bursting into a fit of laughter at just how untamed Shuhei was being. Who knew a simple offer like this could make him so happy? Time to make note of it. “I got it. I’ll inquire about it for you, kay? Oh, here’s the place..” Kensei dropped the subject and trailed off as he ducked into a side street before pushing a shop door open.  
  
“Come on kid, let’s eat and talk about the rest later.” And though he really needed to stop fangirling over the Captain, Shuhei flushed and weakly nodded, following right after.


	2. The Signs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to clarify, the bandage that Shuhei was wearing in Chapter 1 was just to cover his number 69 tattoo. He doesn't have his scars running down his cheek yet. Also, Kensei's birthday is coming up soon (July 30th) so I thought it would be cute to include it in Chapter 2!

If even one more of his men even looked his way, he’d do more than destroy all the surrounding trees around the Ninth training grounds. Today had been a shitty day for starters. Idiots prancing about and making fools of themselves, Mashiro messing everything up of course and Tousen being the typical quiet smartass he was. Why he kept any of them around, he had no idea.    
  
Sighing, Kensei barked out a few orders to send his men scattering about before glancing at Tousen who always seemed to be the tamest of them all. Even though he had been the one to make the final decision of the male joining the Ninth, Kensei sometimes felt like he truly didn’t know the ins and outs of Tousen. He was so damn reserved, even when someone got some sake into his system. He was just...ugh… Unable to put his finger on it, Kensei bit out, “Finish training them.”    
  
“You’re leaving Captain?” Was the soft, reserved response.    
  
“Yeah, I’m getting the fuck out of here before I go Bankai on everyone’s ass. I expect you to handle things while I’m off.” Kensei remarked and before Tousen could answer him, he tore off, looking like a pouting troll running off to find his bridge.    
  
“....yes sir.” Tousen whispered softly, his eyes gazing into nothingness as he bowed politely and turned around the face the relieved Ninth soul reapers. “....let’s go meditate, shall we?” He suggested and was met with happy cries. Work was always easier with Tousen in charge! Much better than their strict Captain or crazy fist-wielding Lieutenant.    
  
In a world of his own, the Captain of the Ninth had no idea where he was headed off, but he didn’t care and just allowed his feet to take him. But it started to make sense as to what he really wanted, when he found himself at the front door of a certain shinigami student’s dorm room. Before he could turn around and badger himself for making such a foolish mental suggestion, he heard the door whirl open and, “Captain Muguruma?”    
  
“...Sir…?” Shuhei uttered a little louder and quickly took a moment to look the older male over. Something seemed a bit off, especially when he spotted all the scratches and bloody cuts sprinkled on the male’s hands. Whatever, or whoever had approached the Captain earlier probably didn’t survive to tell the tale.    
  
“Fuck.” Was all the Captain could utter as his eyes finally quit looking as if they were staring off into space. “Bad day.” Was the explanation he gave. A few months into knowing the kid and already he felt that the teenager understood him better than anyone else. Honestly, Shuhei was like a breath of fresh air in his life.    
  
“Yeah?” Hisagi whispered and startled them both, he reached out to clasp Kensei’s injured hands, tangling the digits with his own. Strangely enough, the teenager didn’t explain his actions and instead looked over the Captain’s shoulders to make sure no one was walking down the hallways before gently pulling the Captain inside his private dorm room. Unlike most of Hisagi’s fellow students, he had his own room but he had his reasons. It was easier dealing with panic attacks or cold sweats in the middle of the night without an audience. And...the Captain had been gracious enough to pay the extra fee that came with the well-needed privacy.    
  
“I think I’ve got a medical kit somewhere, but don’t expect fourth division quality treatment.” The teenager murmured, clamoring about in his mini kitchen to pull a small box from under the sink. Glancing about, the Captain couldn’t help but take in the whole scene. The place was surprisingly spotless, except for a few scattered clothes by the couch. Perhaps the kid had dressed earlier in a hurry? It looked livable at least, but was nowhere the same size as his Captain quarters. Now that he thought of it, even with all the times they had grabbed meals together or Kensei had checked up on Hisagi, the kid had never been by the actual Ninth, let alone the Ninth quarters.    
  
“Eh, you don’t have to go through all the trouble.” Kensei drawled off in an attempt to fill the void of silence, suddenly feeling out of place and glanced back at the front door. Just in order to check on his exit ways, Hisagi halted that thought right in its tracks.    
  
“I locked the door.” Shuhei uttered, not a single emotion flashing across his face as he shoved Kensei down onto the couch and sat beside him, their knees lightly brushing against one another as Hisagi started the process of gently washing the Captain’s hand with a small bowl of warm water and a soft towel. The whole moment felt intimate and suddenly Kensei had to fight the urge to close his eyes and drop his head down to rest against the teenager’s shoulder. But that was a big no-no, and honestly probably would be uncalled for especially in his position of power.    
  
“You locked the door, huh?” Kensei snickered softly, his lips curling into a small grin. “Trying to kidnap me or somethin’?”    
  
“Something like that.” Hisagi laughed quietly, moving the hand towel to the side and started the process of disinfecting the small cuts. Bruises were already starting to form, but it didn’t seem to bother the Captain in any way. It was almost like this was his usual. “But no actually, I just don’t want to be disturbed. People around here see a door and just assume they can barge in.”    
  
“Heh, typical brats.” Kensei joined in the light laughter, memorized in watching as Shuhei’s eyes lit up at their banter back and forth. He should have discovered Shuhei sooner, but it was okay now. They knew each other and though only time would tell, he couldn’t wait for the kid to join his division. No...their division.    
  
“Look, kid...I think you got it all.” The Captain uttered and moved to free his hand, but the stubborn glare the teenager made him immediately stop. Okay...so the kid could totally make scary facial expressions too.    
  
“I didn’t,” Shuhei muttered and put a healing lotion on the cuts before sitting up suddenly as he started to speak once more. “I got you something...for your birthday and I know it’s not till the 30th, but I figure... with what you’ve done to your hands, it might help.”    
  
“Eh,” The Captain straightened and opened his mouth to ask a ton of questions needing answers, but he soon closed his jaws.    
  
“Here. Um...don’t mind the packaging.” Hisagi mumbled, looking a little out of place as he nervously pushed the small package forward. It was loosely wrapped, but it still looked like a lot of thought and work had been put behind it.    
  
“Kid you didn’t have to-”    
  
“Please just open it before I die from embarrassment.” Shuhei quickly uttered and looked away only to cover his face with his hands. “I already feel weird as is. Just do it.”    
  
“Heh, alright. I’ll ease your pain.” Kensei snickered, finding the entire situation amusing as somehow the kid’s discomfort helped ease his own. Ripping open the wrapping, a small box was revealed and again, he opened this part as well only to pause, glancing at the contents.    
  
“....say something. Kami, anything.” Shuhei groaned out, fidgeting in his own seat. “Or actually, don’t say anything. Spare me-”    
  
“Oi,” Kensei cut the mumbling teenager off and reached over to ruffle his hair in an attempt to distract him from his own angst. “It’s nice, kid.” Taking the contents out to reveal they were a set of fingerless, black gloves, he put them on effortlessly, letting Hisagi see his bought item in use.    
  
“So quit worrying. I’ll use them.” The Captain almost asked where Shuhei got the money since he was the one financing the kid’s stuff so he wouldn’t have any more worries, but now wasn’t the time for that, and there was no way in hell he was going to ruin this. Getting a gift from anyone was rare, so he’d definitely take special care of this, even if it was simple or out of the blue.    
  
“.....you’re kidding.” Hisagi murmured in disbelief.    
  
“Nah, I’m not kidding, so quit gapping before a fly flies in.” Kensei stood up and readjusted the gloves as if getting ready to go.    
  
“....you can stay. I don’t have classes for another two hours.” Shuhei blurted out suddenly, looking a little too hopeful for Kensei to look away from that.    
  
“...and tea. I can make some tea.”   
  
“You got yourself a deal.”  
  


* * *

  
  
“So….” Shinji drawled on, staring absentmindedly at his friend and fellow comrade. “We gonna talk about the elephant in the middle of the room?”    
  
“....fuck off. I don’t even get why we need to talk about anything in the first place.” Kensei snapped, trying to sign his paperwork at his desk without being eyed by a horse wannabe man.    
  
“Tousen says you’ve been hanging out almost every day with the kid. The kid that I recommended to you. So if I may say, I deserve some solid thanks.”    
  
“...che, thanks. Satisfied?”    
  
“For now~” Shinji purred, sitting on the edge of the desk, and managed to push some of the paperwork to the side.    
  
“Oi, oi! My desk isn’t a place to wipe your ass on. Jeez, you really are a thorn in my side…” Kensei sighed, rubbing his temples. He was already so damn stressed with all this paperwork and now he had to deal with Shinji’s shit and when was the last time he visited the kid? Yesterday probably, but it felt like ages.    
  
“Captain….Captain?” Tousen murmured softly, finally breaking the Captain of the Ninth’s concentration and caused Shinji to grin even wider. At this rate, Shinji’s face was permanently going to look like that.    
  
“Hn...what is it?”    
  
“Someone is here to see you.”    
  
“Che, well whoever it is, let them in.” Kensei beckoned.    
  
Shuhei was feeling incredibly nervous. The Captain had never forbidden him from visiting the Ninth, but he hadn’t exactly asked either. And yet here he was, standing awkwardly in front of the ninth. It had only been because the man that called himself Tousen had made his acquaintance, quickly figured out what the teenager wanted and pretty much tugged him along.    
  
And to find himself gently pushed into the office, with not only Captian of the Ninth staring at him, but also the Captain of Fifth and god...he was already regretting this. But luckily for his own sake, Kensei seemed to take the initiative.    
  
“Do whatever the hell you want, but I won’t be here to entertain you.” Kensei murmured to Shinji and threw his haori on before snatching Hisagi’s hand, yanking the teenager right out of the office.    
  
“C-Captain I didn’t mean to interrupt-!”    
  
“Relax Shu. You saved me a lot of trouble. Was meaning to kick him out the moment he made an appearance.”    
  
“B-But,” Shuhei stuttered only to yelp when Kensei suddenly halted, making him run face-forward into the Captain’s back. Apologizing, he rubbed his injured nose and tried to save some face, but of course, the Captain wasn’t letting that go.    
  
“Tch, I swear...I said it’s all good Shu. So let’s go run off and do something before I get the nerve to return to the office and strangle Shinji..” Kensei couldn’t help but grin, reaching round to tug Shuhei into a hug of sorts before cupping his face. “Relax, okay? I meant what I said. It’s all good…”    
  
“G..Got it..” Hisagi whispered, his face blossoming into a light pink blush. Their faces were so close and he was suddenly so aware of their few inches height difference and oh god, why did the Captain look so good all of a sudden-?!    
  
“Good. Now straighten up and let’s go do something productive.” The Captain gave the student’s shoulder a pat and released him.    
  
“Can we train together..?” Hisagi blurted out, his hand reaching out to grip the male’s haori in his fist. “I mean-”    
  
“Heh, good idea. I can see if you’ve improved at all.”    
  
“I-I have! I’ll show you!”    
  
“Bet you will brat...bet you will.” 


	3. The Calm Before The Storm

It had to be at least the tenth time Shuhei had found himself on his back or with a mouthful of dirt. Training with a Captain one on one before even becoming an official soul reaper was probably a dream for many, but this...this was nothing like the teenager had imagined. This was far beyond anything he had dreamed….because in his dreams he was at least putting up a good fight!  
  
Spittin out some dirt that had managed to worm its way past his lips, Hisagi grumbled and did his best as he stood up to also brush himself off. He was coated in dirt and grass marks. And apparently from that wide grin plastered to a certain Captain’s face, he was finding this all highly entertaining.  
  
“Seriously?” Hisagi murmured, but the grin that was still quite permanently on Kensei’s face made him unconsciously break into a small, bemused smile. “You’re the worst, I swear.” But Hisagi didn’t say it with any heat vibrating in his tone of voice and rather just fell back once more to rest against the grass. Everything in his body was sore or bruised and there was no way, he was walking away here anytime soon. Seemed the Captain had a similar thing in mind as he dropped right down beside the teenager, allowing their sides to brush up against one another as they both stared up at the sunset and the stars that were sure to show up at some point.  
  
“Heh, I wouldn’t be so hard on yourself.” Kensei remarked, settling back with his hands resting behind his head. It was peaceful in a way laying here like this. At least the breeze blowing through felt nice against his skin, considering he had built up a bit of a sweat from training Hisagi. “You put up a good fight.”  
  
“Oh, yes I fought well. Slammed the dirt a few times...so great to be the victor over that.” Shuhei grumbled immaturely and made Kensei laugh and reach over to roughly ruffle Hisagi sweaty bangs. “Enough, kid. You did good. You’ve improved a lot since I last saw you train.”  
  
“You mean it…?”  
  
“Of course. Ah, but..” Kensei trailed off, causing the teenager to roll over onto his side and glance up at the Captain, eyes partly closed due to too much sunlight getting into his eyes even as it dimmed with the sunset.  
  
“You could use a shower,” Kensei remarked only to let out a wheezed laugh when Shuhei whacked his stomach and charged off.  
  
“You’re the worst!”  
  
“Yeah, yeah…” Snickering still under his breath, the Captain got up and followed after the kid. It was always fun triggering Hisagi’s small bursts of annoyance and anger.  
  
“I mean it...!” The Shinigami student hollered, but he seemed less annoyed and more embarrassed, with the faint blush coating his cheeks said anything.  
  
“Sure kid. Plan on joining my division and already got my tattoo. Yeah, totally I’m the worst.” Having caught up with the other, Kensei patted Shuhei’s shoulder. ‘Ease up. We both need one. The ninth division is closer, so just use the showers at the quarters.”  
  
“....you want us to shower…..together?” Hisagi started connecting dots, only to raise both eyebrows. “....I never took you for a pervert Captain.”  
  
“Ah, jeez. Like as if.” Kensei nearly rolled his eyes at that silly assumption. “There are multiple showers, so calm down those teenage hormones. No need to get the hopes up.”  
  
“Ugh, you-!”  
  
“Oi, you still haven’t addressed the subject. Yes or no, kid?”  
  
Hisagi looked disinterested at that, but reluctantly couldn’t help but agree that a shower was a good idea. “...Fine.” He grumbled, and suddenly glanced back, having felt a pair of eyes boring into the back of his neck, but strangely there was no one there. Just...what was that?  
  
  
\-----  
  
  
Tousen’s glass-like eyes narrowed, but still he could see nothing. All he could feel was the spiritual pressure pulsing and radiating from both men ahead of him. Tousen could feel their joined power even in the depths of his body and bones. He knew little of the teenager trailing alongside his Captain, but he did still have some reservations even with few known facts. Aizen-sama’s plan was set for certain matters at hand, and if this..well, child wormed his way further into the Captain of Ninth’s life, that might ensue some chaos that Aizen-sama would disapprove of.  
  
He would need to report his findings and concerns to Aizen-sama….as soon as possible.  
  


* * *

  
  
A day after training with his favorite Captain and Hisagi was feeling incredibly jittery. It wasn’t every day that he was told that he was allowed to go on a mission in the World of the Living. Only downside was that he had to take some of the younger years with him. Hopefully, the younger students wouldn’t drag him down, but again...he had to remind himself that the mission was to educate them.  
  
**_“So yer babysitting them.”_ ** Kazeshini chipped in, providing commentary that Shuhei couldn’t help but agree with, but of course he couldn’t just state that out loud. Captain Muguruma had filled paper after stacks of paperwork to ensure Hisagi would get this opportunity. He needed to be grateful.  
  
**_“Yer thoughts are freaking loud.”_ ** Kazeshini snapped in frustration from Shuhei’s inner world. They were surprisingly closer than many would expect. Hisagi had some reservations about the shape of Kazeshini’s curved blade, but he wasn’t scared of the zanpakuto. And, admittedly Kazeshini could add some good snarky retorts. How they had ended up together though, Hisagi had no idea.  
  
“It’s my head idiot. Of course, you’re going to hear it all.” Hisagi hissed under his breath, ignoring the glare a female student sitting beside him gave. Guess he wasn’t being that quiet, but at least the lecturing teacher wasn’t paying much attention. The few benefits of being one of the best students and sitting towards the back of the classroom.  
  
**_“Oh, trust me I hear and see all the shit you think of. Those porny dreams of yers? Yeah, I gotta listen and watch that shit.”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “Jeez, shut it!”  
  
“.....Hisagi….to the principal’s office now!”  
  
**_“.....wasn’t my freaking fault.”_ ** Kazeshini snickered with a crackling laugh, the gleeful sound vibrating in Hisagi’s ears as he got up to his feet and stormed out of the classroom after being snapped at by his homeroom teacher. It wasn’t every day that the best in the class was ordered to the principal’s office.  
**_  
_ ** “It so was.” The teenager growled angrily under his breath and turned right around the corner only to curse when his face slammed right into a wall of muscle. Rubbing his injured nose, Hisagi stepped back like he’d been burnt and was about to give whatever poor student had stepped into his path a piece of his mind, but all thoughts stilled when he realized it was his favorite Captain. What was up with today!? And what was with this cheezy sudden run in??  
  
“Oi, kid. Miss me that much?” The Captain snickered in amusement and roughly ruffled Hisagi’s hair. That habit of touching his hair was something Shuhei never completely understood. Originally he felt like a dog getting a good scratch behind the ears and for that he hated the idea of it, but admittedly when he was having a day as hard as today...well...it was nice being touched so affectionately like that. “You could have just asked for a hug instead of stealing one, y’know…”  
  
“.....Seriously?” Hisagi gawked only to sigh and push away the hands. “What brings you here sir?”  
  
Kensei held up two sets of bento boxes. “You need to eat more and I figured I’d track you down at your class before you could run off.”  
  
“....that’s….” Shuhei blinked in pure surprise. He didn’t know whether or not to feel touched or confused as to why the Captain was putting so much effort and time into him. Was he really worth the investment??  
  
“Hella nice of me? I know.”  
  
“.....I have to go to the principal’s office.”  
  
“Ah, troublemaker, huh?” Kensei raised an eyebrow before sighing and throwing Hisagi over his shoulder. Time to get more aggressive. Immediately Shuhei started squirming, lightly whacking Kensei’s back as he stuttered, turning into a wild mess of redness. “T-The hell---C-Captain Muguruma!! I can walk on my own!”  
  
“Says the kid with raccoon eyes and looking like death…”  
  
“.....l-look, I’m fine!”  
  
“Yeah, so you say. Eat and get some sleep first and then you can say that.” Kensei uttered as a rebuttal only to pat Shuhei’s back. “Too bad for you, I’ve got a shit ton to do so in order to kill two birds with one stone, you’re coming back to the office with me.”  
  
“And if I refuse?”  
  
“You’re in no position to refuse, brat.”  
  
“.....you’re evil.”  
  
“Nah, I'm just a good cook actually. You’ll see.”  
  
And damn Kensei for being so right. Having been dropped onto the small couch in the Captain’s office and handed the bento, he took his first bite and quickly had to force back a low moan. Not only was his mentor impressive on the battlefield, but he could whip up a good meal too. He hoped the Captain didn’t catch the look on his face...he didn’t need to stroke the older man’s ego.  
  
“Good, huh?” The Captain asked and stepped over to kick and lock his door shut to keep a certain green-haired lieutenant out of the way. If she was to get wind that he had cooked for the teenager and not her...well she would probably throw a fit. A fit he was so not in the mood to put up with at the moment.  
  
“It’s….good.” Hisagi admitted shyly, only to hesitate. “You really made this?”

  
“Course I did.” Kensei uttered, almost too proudly for his own good. “Heh, I should have done this sooner if I knew this would get you to get some more muscle on your bones.”  
  
“.....I’d love to smack you behind the head for that comment,” Shuhei mumbled and swallowed a bit before finishing his statement with, “but I’ll forgive it this once because of this.”  
  
“Heh, whatever you say Shu.” The Captain dug into his own bento, but paid little attention to the kid sitting on the couch as he turned his attention to the stack of papers dominating the desk’s surface. Soon the room was filled with the soft sounds of Shuhei’s chopsticks cleaning his bento box clean and Kensei’s scribbling away with the pen. There was something nice about the quietness of the moment and just enjoying each other’s company. Setting aside the bento box and softly uttering thanks for the meal, Hisagi settled further into the couch’s backing, sinking further into the material. God...he could almost….  
  
Glancing up at some point with the goal in mind to confirm Hisagi was still eating, Kensei blinked in surprise to find the kid slouched over, head resting against the arm of the couch. Was his meal that good that it forced the teenager into a coma?? Standing up and moving around the desk to bend down before Shuhei, he couldn’t help checking the kid’s pulse before chuckling quietly. He knew it. The damn brat really had been worn out.  
  
_Fuck...the kid looked kinda cute…._ The Captain suddenly felt the urge to reach out and gently tuck a strand of black hair behind the boy’s ear, which he surprisingly did with a level of tenderness he didn’t think he was capable of. Sucking in a shaky breath and pulling his hand away, Kensei hesitated before shrugging his haori off and laid it across Shuhei, letting the male use it as a blanket for now, or at least while the Captain returned to signing away paperwork.  
  
Shifting slightly in his sleep, Shuhei leaned into the warmth near his cheek, but by then it was gone, leaving behind a lingering, familiar warmth. _Whatever it was...come back…  
_ _  
_ _  
_ _\---------  
_ _  
_ _  
“Oi, Kid…” Hisagi heard right by his ear and immediately his eyes flew open only to discover their faces were extremely pressed close. So close in fact that he could feel that man’s breath brush against his skin.  
  
“....y..yeah…?” Hisagi croaked out, hands digging into a fabric that had to be the couch, wait why were his hands on the Captain’s waist!? Why was the Captain border lining on completely pinning him against the couch?! Just what the hell was happening!?  
  
_ _“Ease up.” Kensei purred, sounding a little too cocky for his own good and leaned in. All Hisagi could feel was heat radiating from the Captain, feel their noses touch-_  
  
Crying right as his eyes flew open, the teenager fell smack right off the couch, causing the Captain of the Ninth to sit up and stare in amusement as Hisagi stuttered and fumbled back onto the couch. It had been a dream, truly something his brain had imagined….why?  
  
**_“Oi, quit freakin’ out. It wasn’t even that bad compared to yer other dreams. This one was tame as fuck.”_ ** Kazeshini snickered.  
  
“You good kid?” Kensei interrupted the snarky comment Shuhei had prepared for his meddling zanpakuto and gave a weak nod. “Y..Yeah just had a nightmare.” A better explanation than, totally just dreamed of you nearly kissing me.  
  
**_“Heh, nice save. Totally not suspicious…”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “....yeah?” Kensei gave a knowing look that the teenager didn’t have a nightmare.  
  
“Yes….so drop it. Please.” He bit out with clenched teeth, ignoring the Captain’s small snicker. God have mercy on his soul. He changed his mind. He couldn't wait for the mission the World of the Living to start tomorrow. 


	4. When All Falls Apart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is going to be a little bloody....just throwing that out there but I promise that I have a sweet chapter coming up after this!
> 
> Also, I created a new tumbler for my GimmeKensei account! I'll post heads up and summaries in the future there! [Gimmekensei tumbler](https://gimmekenseiposts.tumblr.com/)

So far the class in the world of the living was going as expected for the most part. Sometimes it would get a little frustrating when the younger year students would break into giggling groups and cause more trouble than good. He spotted a tattooed red-haired male in the corner with a girl half his height and a boy with them that had the most emo look he’d seen a while. And that was saying something. Jeez, this group of kids were really just getting weirder and weirder with each coming year.  
  
The whole purpose of this training mission was to help formed groups of three students practice their konso. Yelling out instructions, Shuhei sighed under his breath in relief when he felt the class period end coming near. Only a few more minutes and then he could room back to his dorm...or better yet if they finished this soon enough he might have enough time to pay Captain Muguruma another visit. He had been meaning to do so for a while, but finals and all these added missions were causing his time to run thin.  
  
A sudden high pitch screech was the real warning Shuhei got that something was abruptly seriously wrong, and his suspicions were only confirmed when he turned to watch wide-eyed as a hollow’s arm went right through Hotara’s chest. Not frozen in place like Hisagi was, his fellow student Aoga tried to retaliate, but he ended up injured as well from the same hollow.  
  
_This wasn’t supposed to be happening….! What the hell was going on, this had to be a horrible dream-!!!!!!!_ _  
_ _  
_ Hisagi’s bottom lip trembled in fear only to cry out when a hollow claw rammed down, racking its mark down his cheek. Jumping back, his vision in his right eye started to flicker in and out, and all he could see from it, for the most part, was bright crimson red. _  
_ _  
_ **_“Oi, fucker! Get yer head out of the gutter!”_ ** Kazeshini yelled, forcing Hisagi to break his frozen stance and yell at the students. “Get out of here before any more of you all get hurt!”  
  
**_“That wasn’t what I planned on ya fucking doing-! It’s us against a shit ton of hollows! Are ya TRYING to get hurt, or killed, huh!? It’s my job to kill ya, not those freakin’ hollows…!”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “Shut up!” A bead of sweat trickled down Shuhei’s forehead and down on his cheek as he bettered his stance before starting to attack, unable to buy himself time beforehand to check on his fallen friends. He could only pray that their injuries were healable...For a good moment or two, both he and Kazeshini were in perfect sync with one another, but more distractions kept falling into Shuhei’s lap. Hearing blades clash with a hollow’s skin that definitely wasn’t due to Kazeshini’s blades, Shuhei’s eyes shot over and widened in horror and disbelief as he spotted the same weird group from earlier returning and further yet, fighting alongside him.  
  
“You idiots…! You should have gone back!”  
  
“And leave you on your own? Are you crazy!?!? With all due respect senpai, we’re staying!” The tattooed, pineapple wannabe yelled, and hell in this moment of time Hisagi couldn’t argue with that.  
  
“Having some trouble?” A voice uttered behind Hisagi, messing with his scattered senses further as Lieutenant Aizen made his grand appearance with a silver-haired young boy flanked at his side. Wasn’t that child known as Gin? And besides that, what was a lieutenant doing here?!  
  
“Heh, poor child. Fighting like this isn’t good for one’s health.” Aizen’s hand rose and suddenly covered Shuhei’s bleeding face. “Sleep.” He uttered, his voice growing strangely dark and foreign but Hisagi didn’t have enough time to question it as his vision blurred further and he fell to the darkness rapidly surrounding him.  
  
Like a mad scientist observing his latest experiment, Aizen watched as Shuhei dropped lifelessly to the ground as the other students fought in the distance, unaware of the history in the making unfolding just around the trees. Ah, but a shame that the boy would crumble so quickly. And here Aizen had previously had such higher expectations considering that Captain Muguruma had been developing a reputation for being eagerly protective behind the scenes for this fallen teenager.  
  
“Handle the rest Gin. The tests went as smoothly as we expected. Tousen has done well.” Aizen stepped away, and let his glasses fall off as he continued on through the maze of trees. His fingers swept through his hair, recreating the swept back bang look that he always preferred on himself. For good measure, he left instructions for Gin to wipe the boy's memory if for some lucky chance he survived to retell what had happened.   
  
Everything was falling accordingly to plan. Tousen’s promise of becoming Captain with Shuhei Hisagi as his lieutenant would be fulfilled and soon….soon enough Aizen would be the head of the fifth division. Just you wait. The fun was only just getting started.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Captain Muguruma was one of the first to catch the news that a mission in the World of the Living for basic training had suddenly been surrounded and attacked by a pack of hollows. Few survivors, he’d been told by a paled faced soul reaper who started trembling in his shoes the moment Kensei's lips peeled back in a growl that could send tremors down any man's spine.   
  
Storming angrily down the hallways of the forth, Kensei stuck his head through every single room, but all the injured students he came across weren’t wearing a familiar tattoo. Where the hell was Shuhei!?  
  
“Captain Muguruma?” A quiet voice inquired and right at that, Kensei growled and turned on his heel. “The fuck do you need Lieutenant?” He uttered, glaring daggers at an overly innocent looking Aizen. “I was merely checking if there was something I could help with...you have been running around like a mad man after all...if you don’t mind my observation.”  
  
“Che, look here I don’t have time for this bullcrap-”  
  
“He’s not here Captain.” Aizen murmured, hiding his amusement. Who knew that a simple disappearance of a certain teenager would cause the Captain of the Ninth to lose his composure like this? “I recommend you leave things be for now…” He added and before Kensei could grab him by the collar and slam him against the wall for some answers, he turned and left the building.  
  
**_“Master...I believe we should visit the site of the attack.”_ ** As sweet as honey, Tachikaze’s voice rang through the Captain’s ears, causing him to focus once more. **_“Afterwards I urge that we question Lieutenant Sosuke. I believe him to be hiding something worth us knowing.”_ **  
  
“Best idea you’ve had all day.”  
  
**_“Well, I do aim to please master.”  
  
_**

* * *

Surveying the grounds around him, Kensei kept Tachikaze’s thoughts close to his as he wandered through the clearing. He knew he was in the right area the moment he caught the scent of fresh blood. Making a slight face at the smell of death and carnage, Kensei pushed through the underbrush, but alas no Shuhei. There was no way that the kid could suddenly disappear right off the face of the Earth.  
  
“Ha….ha... “  
  
Hearing faint, raspy breathing, Kensei immediately tore further through the woods before halting right then and there. There was so much damn blood and in the middle of it all was his brat laying in a pool of blood....Warm blood oozing from his injured form. Right then and there, everything fell into place. This kid meant the world to him, and the fact that his fingerless gloved hands were trembling just showed how scared shitless he was of losing the teenager. Role of Captain be damned, Hisagi was his only priority right now.  
  
Dropping hard onto his knees, the fabric he wore already started to soak up some of the blood from the continuously flowing pool around them. Reaching out to cup Hisagi’s cheek and survey the damage, he quickly pressed a hand to the boy’s throat to add pressure from the cut injury there. There was so much blood, so many cuts...he wasn’t even sure if the kid would be able to survive the night at this rate. Putting in a hurried call for medical assistance from the Fourth, Kensei shakily sucked in a breath through clenched teeth and ripped the fabric from his haori to help with the cuts at least on the boy’s right side of his face.  
  
“C-C...apta..in….” A weak voice croaked out, sounding utterly like death. One eye peered up to lock on Kensei’s mentally rocked expression. Hisagi seemed to be trying to say something else too, but Kensei quickly ssh him as tenderly as a brute of a man like him could and kept his hands where they were. “It’s okay kid. Helps coming so just concentrate on staying awake for me and breathing.”  
  
Hisagi whimpered, everything aching and stinging harshly, but he still so desperately wanted to express just how grateful he was to get the chance to see the Captain one last time. Earlier when he’d been by himself and laying in his own pool of blood, he had assumed that his time was arriving. Fast. Even Kazeshini had been in agreement with that thought and for that same very reason, he’d been startlingly quiet. Guess, even kill-spree loving zanpakutos could be nervous of the approach of death too.  
  
Kensei eased Shuhei’s head up slightly to rest against his knee and that seemed to help a bit, but even that still caused pain to shoot down Hisagi’s spine. “AAah-!!!” A broken scream tore from his lips before he bit down harshly, so hard in fact that he nearly drew blood.  
  
“Fuck, fuck..okay, it’s gonna be okay... “ Kensei kept repeating, unsure if he was uttering those words for Shuhei or for himself.  
  
Eyes slipping close, Shuhei couldn’t hear as Kensei kept repeating the words. Instead, he let his head slide over and rest partly on the Captain’s chest, causing even more blood to soak in Kensei’s skin and clothing, but he was too tired to care. Breathing shakily, the Captain just tucked Hisagi's form against his and kept the needed pressure up. He needed to stop the blood flow...  
  
_Shuhei just needed some sleep….god...Captain Muguruma felt so warm...felt like home._


	5. Sanctuary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Due to his injuries, Shuhei finds himself locked in his inner world, and for one reason and another, he doesn't want to leave. Kazeshini refuses to allow that and forces Shuhei awake and back into the real world....

Everything was dark. As much as Shuhei Hisagi attempted to break free from its grasp, the darkness kept it’s grip on him as if encouraging him to sleep more. He felt drugged by its familiar warmth and the draw to just let everything go. If this was the afterlife, he could be content with this. This darkness wasn’t something to fear but rather an escape way from all over the exits. It was salvation...it was a sanctuary and a place to recharge. For those very reasons, Shuhei couldn’t find the heart to leave its warm embrace.  
  
 **_“Oi, yer pitiful...ya know that right?”_ ** Kazeshini’s voice vibrated through Shuhei’s skull, but in the darkness, he saw nothing to pinpoint on. But there was no need to worry for now. Kazeshini was as much a part of the darkness as he was. Their inner world reflected this. The world they had created within Shuhei spread far and wide with rolling hills in a world void of light. But as one travels further, they would come across a small cabin that looked out of place, for in there was the only source of light. The light was a dim light bulb that hung from a single set of wires that swung back and forth in repetitive motions like a pendulum. When and why it turned off and on at seemingly random moments, neither knew but that was typical of Shuhei Hisagi’s inner world.  
  
 **_“We’re pretty cut up and all ya wanna do is stay in here. At this rate, ya’ll just be a useless sack of bones. Least ya could do is wake the fuck up and find whoever the fucker did this to us.”_ ** Kazeshini never seemed to have it easy, but he didn’t go out of his way either to change that. The grittier and broken beyond repair something was, Kazeshini wanted to ruin it even further. It was no secret that Kazeshini was more of a bodily poison or a devil than a basically functioning zanpakuto. But just because he preferred broken objects, didn’t mean he was quick to try ruining Shuhei. Even with all their bickering and disagreements, Shuhei unlike anything Kazeshini had known had always attempted to truly understand him. The fact that every once in awhile, Hisagi went out of his way to pick a fight so Kazeshini could sharpen his skills and not go rusty from boredom was admittedly….sweet. Not that you would ever hear such a cheesy word slip from his lips! And well, whether Kazeshini liked it or not, he felt like he owed Hisagi something for all the thought and trouble dealt with for his expense.  
  
Normally dragging people down to hell was more Kazeshini’s cup of tea, but well...there was always a first time for everything. Even if he had to go to the trouble of dragging Shuhei by the collar right out the mound of darkness he had been cocooned in, he’d do it...pride be damned.  
  
He’d better get a good fight later for all his hard work though.  
  
\----------------  
  
“Easy there.” A voice suddenly broke a clearing in the darkness, and was the only warning Shuhei Hisagi got before his eyelids flew wide open. Suddenly everything was incredibly too bright and whether he realized it or not, his arms flayed about, searching for anything that would block the light, but it seemed someone else got the idea. He heard something get yanked, like a curtain and then the light cut off. It left him enough time to slowly adjust to the dimness of the...room he found himself in. Staring in confusion, he glanced down to spot the iv in his arm only to groan and drop his head back against the pillow supporting him. His head was ringing and his face was stinging like a bitch.  
  
“...wa...ter…” He croaked out and tossed his free hand over his face only to hiss when his fingers came into contact with the injured skin. He hadn’t expected the spearing pain that contact would have caused.  
  
“Oi, easy…” Things were becoming clearer...and Shuhei seriously hoped he was actually seeing correctly when Captain Muguruma stepped into his view. He watched quietly as the Captain stepped away from the chair by the bed to pour a glass of water from the pitcher by the bedside. The white walls without a single decoration in place and the IV in his arm was making it really obvious that he was currently in the Fourth. Things weren’t fully clear yet, but his head hurt too much right now to even attempt to try and piece everything together on that day. Besides that though, why was the Captain here? Captain Muguruma always liked to mention how recently the workload had gotten worse, which meant no extra free time...so….  
  
Kensei seemed to get the hint from Shuhei’s only uninjured eye scattering wildly about in confusion. Readjusting the teenager’s pillows, and ever so slowly easing the boy up until he was in a sitting position, he held the filled glass up. “Don’t give that look kid, I’ve been keeping myself busy here. The Fourth is probably at their wits end with me being here all the time, but...eh...gotta keep an eye on ya and they didn’t agree to you staying at my division, so here we are. Now open up…” He murmured quietly, eyes narrowing slightly in concentration as he helped by holding the water up as Shuhei shakily took one, then two sips before whining and pulling back.  
  
“Easy does it…” Kensei whispered more quietly this time around and was about to sit back down in the chair by the bedside, but Hisagi wasn’t having any of that. His hand lashed out to seize one of the Captain’s hands. The teenager felt fabric underneath his fingertips and immediately made a happy note that even in all of this, the Captain was still wearing the gift from him.  
  
“You came for me….you were there-” He started to whisper, but the look Kensei gave him made him go quiet. “Kid, as much as I want to know what happened and trust me...the Captain in me would love to act like an interrogator, I need you to heal up and leave the worrying to me.” Kensei’s eyes settled down to the floor only for him to give Hisagi’s hand a gentle squeeze. The silence that followed afterward was peaceful at best. Tenderness radiated from their joint touch and somehow Hisagi felt that something had changed. The true question though was who changed who?  
  
“You’ve been working...and watching over me.” It wasn’t a question or a ponder. It was a statement, as simple as that. But there was a touch of gratefulness as if a ‘thank you’ was on the mere tip of Hisagi’s tongue. The Captain didn’t respond and merely shuddered slightly and with his free hand the older male pulled the chair closer to Shuhei’s side. Keeping their hands locked together, Kensei sat down so they were more at an eye level. “Yeah... “ He finally rasped out, resting his elbow on the bed and brought Shuhei’s hand up to his lips, brushing his slightly chapped lips against the top of the teenager’s knuckles. “I...thought I’d lose you, kid.”  
  
Hisagi’s hand trembled after the brush of skin, but the squeeze he gave afterward showed he didn’t mind one bit. It was worth mentioning that he wasn’t used to such tenderness from anyone. Again, he felt as though something was different, but no matter what it was, he was finding that he was loving it. Shuhei had ages ago learned to realize that Kensei was more than just a hero to him. He was a mentor, someone to respect and follow behind, someone he could trust and lean on for support...he was quickly becoming Hisagi’s world in a well-rounded manner. It seemed the Captain was starting to catch up and see that there was more to the teenager than just being a student that looked up to him.  
  
“F-Fuck…” Kensei finally choked out and bowed his head slightly only to go wide-eyed when Hisagi’s hand peeled away from his and reached back to cup the back of his head. A welcoming shiver ran down his back at the contact as Hisagi’s fingers branched out to run through the shorter strands of hair on Kensei’s head. He wasn’t going to say no to such comfort, but hell-  
  
“You haven’t been taking care of yourself.” Hisagi finally whispered and though he was weak all over, he found the strength to gently lay the Captain’s head down on his lap, still gently weaving his fingers through the older soul reaper’s hair.  
  
“Can’t deny that one.” Kensei uttered faintly, and though Shuhei couldn’t see the man’s expression, he could tell that the Captain’s eyes had slipped close. “You’ve worked hard, so…” Hisagi trailed off only to sigh. This wasn’t working. “Sit up.” He suddenly ordered, making Kensei stiffen and quickly sit up, scared to death that Hisagi was pissed or in pain, but- “Get on the bed.”  
  
Oh. _Oh. Well shit._ Kensei was suddenly feeling the urge that he should probably be crossing the room and locking the door. “What?”  
  
“You need sleep. I doubt you’ll go home and you’ll probably say that you’ll need to stay awake so as to keep an eye on me. So kill two birds with one stone and sleep beside me.”  
  
“And if I roll onto you?” Kensei uttered with a low chuckle, making Shuhei smile weakly. “I’ll punch you in the gut.”  
  
“Well, then...since you’re the one making the orders now I guess I gotta obey, huh?” The Captain moved onto the bed, laying by the edge and on his side to give Hisagi some space to breathe, but the teenager had other things on the brain it seemed. Shuhei snuggled close, pressing their forms together and tucked his head under Kensei’s chin, burying himself fully in the Captain’s front.  
  
“You’re warm...just like then.” Hisagi observed quietly, unaware that the Captain was struggling to understand what to do or say without seeming like a total creep in this bizarre situation. “I couldn’t hear you...well barely when everything happened. All I could do was feel this...feel you.” Shuhei choked out, only to be cut off by Kensei’s hand settling down to gently cup the uninjured side of his face and started stroking the skin there with the back of his thumb.  
  
“I’m not going anywhere, Shu. This warmth is gonna stay so close those eyes and I’ll hold ya as long as it takes to make everything better.” Seeing that innocent, trustful expression on Shuhei’s face made the Captain feel the new urge to kiss it all better...but that...was well….this was Shu. He wasn’t going to destroy whatever they had in this moment with an uncalled for kiss. For now, just holding him was good enough and later he could try to figure out why the hell he was having a kissing urge for someone dependent on him.  
  
“Cap...tain…” Hisagi trailed off, but he was already out like a light. His body still needed a ton of healing, so it made sense that he would pass out so quickly after that. Tucked away against the Captain’s warmth also helped lure him into dream time.


	6. Comes Crashing Together

**\----- Two weeks Later -----**  
  
 _Goddammit, he shouldn’t....._ It wasn’t right to keep barging into Shuhei’s life but fuck...he hadn’t heard from the kid since he’d been discharged from the Fourth after the field lesson accident. It was selfish, but Kensei wanted to check up on him...to ensure Shuhei was handling everything well and wasn’t…planning on not joining his division. He wouldn’t blame the teenager for shying away from joining a division now that he had his real taste of violence and had been so heavily scarred from him.  
  
So that was exactly why Kensei was standing right before the Academy's dorms where he knew Shuhei resided in the evenings.  
  
“Captain Muguruma?” A voice broke through Kensei’s thoughts and alerted him to the fact he wasn’t alone outside.  
  
“Heh, I didn’t take you for a stalker.” Shuhei laughed softly. He seemed well enough...or at least as well put together as someone could after such an accident. And hell, Kensei could have sworn that he died a little when Hisagi laughed. It was one of the most beautiful sounds that he had ever heard. But at the same time, he felt more than embarrassed that the sounds were emitted from the other's lips at his expense. He did continue to listen to Shuhei though, although his eyes were staring at anything but him.  
  
“Well, uh…” _Why the hell was he of all people acting all shy?! He was stuttering like a damn brat half his age!_

“I’m teasing.” Shuhei remarked, now hyper focusing on that because of the silence spreading between them. Despite what Hisagi said, the Captain wasn't sure if he would be able to be too comfortable with the continuous silences between them. “I see you came to pay a visit? Someone from the Fourth sent you, I assume?” He asked quietly, looking utterly delectable in the moonlight as he stepped forth with the Captain following closely behind until they reached the lake that existed by the school.  
  
“Watch out.”  
  
Kensei only barely heard the warning before the teenager stepped into the water with his white shihakushō, quick to splash some water near the Captain’s feet. Startled by the sudden act of the water getting nearly onto his shoes, Kensei furrowed his brow and opened his mouth, “Tch, getting cocky now-" before he could even dare to finish the statement, Shuhei gave him the sweetest smile he had ever seen, the sight being enough to knock the air out of his lungs. Thrown off, the Captain struggled for words, not finding anything to follow up the awkward silence that he had engaged in. He watched the other kick off his shoes and continue splashing around in the water and finally figured that he should do the same. Quiet as he still attempted to figure Hisagi out, Kensei set his socks and shoes neatly to the side of Shuhei before approaching him, curiosity filling his stare. 

“What?” Shuhei muttered and raked a wet hand through his hair. “You keep giving me that look. Weren’t you the one that always encouraged me to act freer?” Hisagi turned to fully face the Captain as they both stood in the knee-high water that lapped at their skin. “I think I get it now.”  
  
“Oh? Get what?” Kensei chuckled and stepped closer into the deeper depths of the lake.  
  
“You’re just tied down as I am. By all of this.” He waved his hand in the air, only to copy the Captain’s earlier chuckle. “I’m not wrong am I?” He muttered before running his hand over the water, creating another splash.  
  
Kensei flinched at the sight of the water, not entirely sure how he was going to counter the sudden attack. Nor did he know where this conversation topic was coming from. He settled on dashing into the water himself, not even bothering to roll up the pants. Sure the wet cloth weighed him down, but that wouldn't stop him from dashing through the shallow water. As Shuhei prepared to throw the water towards him, he dipped down lower, sinking to his chest in water. The younger of the two was preparing to throw some water as well, but it seemed that Shuhei had already beat him to it, and Kensei was able to figure this out before he had even tried to scoop up the water in his hands.  
  
Letting the splash hit him, Kensei wrinkled his nose and let the water out from his hands to wipe the liquid off of his eyes, only to quickly dip back down to cup some more water in his hands. He then proceeded to toss it at Shuhei, obviously pleased to have gotten the other just as wet as well. “Heh, like getting a taste of your own medicine?” 

The Captain was going to splash right back, but instead, he reached out to wrap his arms around Shuhei’s waist. He noticed the other getting unsteady, but knowing that didn't make his grip falter. If anything, it made him tighten his grip around the teenager’s waist. “Look kid, as much as it’s fun running free a bit...getting wet and cold isn’t good for your health.”  
  
“I’m fine...I’m fine!” Hisagi snapped and though he was on unstable footing, he tried to pull away which caused the Captain to nearly fall as well. Cursing and steadying them both, Kensei’s arms wormed further around Shuhei’s waist, letting the boy cling to his chest for any sense of balance. Shuhei seemed to see how this situation looked by the fact that a bright red color crossed his pale cheeks.  
  
“Shu…” Kensei mentally cursed. Just what the hell was going on? Maybe he was overthinking it all and Shuhei was just jumpy? He was confident that this was the case, but the rapidly beating heartbeat he could hear that was definitely not his heart said otherwise. 

“.....I’m tired. Sore. Feel like someone just dumped an entire mountain on me. I’m sick and tired of being locked up in my room every day. My teacher won’t let me come back to school unless I have a notice approving it from the Fourth, but the Fourth says I’m not ready yet.” Hisagi suddenly blurted out as his head fell to rest against Kensei’s chest. “....I didn’t mean to snap at you.”  
  
“Shit happens and you’ve been through a lot Shu...I get it. No hard feelings.” The Captain muttered back and started with one hand to run his hand up and down the boy’s back, trying to soothe him with all his might. “I wouldn’t blame you if you had a sudden change of heart.”  
  
“....” Shuhei paused and poked his head up to gaze up at Kensei. “...what are you trying to imply?”  
  
“That you might want to go to a different division or not become a soul reaper.”  
  
“....you know...I wouldn’t want that.” the teenager whispered, and chewed nervously on his bottom lip. “I’ve spent ages trying to find you...and I’ve finally caught up to you. I’m not going to just go against everything I’ve worked hard for. So...s-so don’t say..” Shuhei swallowed only to shiver when Kensei shifted and managed to tug Hisagi even closer.  
  
“Yeah, I shouldn’t have. Sorry kid...” Kensei whispered and surprised them both by pressing an affectionate kiss to the top of Hisagi’s wet head of hair. And fuck, the moment that Hisagi looked back up in shock with those damn innocent eyes, Kensei knew what bridge he wanted to cross.  
  
And by the way Shuhei’s arms reached up and curled around his throat, his lips nearing, Kensei wasn’t the only one willing to break some boundaries.  
  


* * *

  
How they transitioned from the lake and to his futon at his dorm, Shuhei had no true idea but the fleeting thought dissipated and was replaced instead with a clawing urgency to pull their bodies close together again. Seemed the Captain had a similar idea in mind as he pushed Hisagi right down onto the futon before settling over him, letting his lips do the real talking as he hungrily locked their lips together. Neither seemed to care that their clothes were still a little damp from being out in the lake.  
  
Gasping breathlessly after each hot kiss, Shuhei shakily keened and dug his fingers through Kensei’s hair before locking onto him by gripping those silver strands. None of it was enough for the soul reaper trainee. He wanted their bodies to be locked together and yet even that didn’t feel good enough. He wanted their forms to mingle together in a manner that there was no escape. He wanted their connection to keep them closer than ever, gluing their forms together. Where was a bottle of super glue when you really needed it to meld two together?  
  
Shuhei felt a shiver run down his spine as one of Kensei’s fingers brushed against the injured side of his face that wasn’t covered anymore but was still tender, to say the least. The teenager almost wanted to pull away since that was still a sore area in so many different ways, but Kensei gently soothed him with another sweeter, softer kiss and kept gently stroking the scarring skin, as if trying to show Hisagi that every part of him mattered. And that sure did the trick of making Shuhei feel warm and fuzzy all over.  
  
Shaking faintly from just raw the last kiss had felt, Hisagi broke the kiss and sat up slightly, letting their breaths mingle while their foreheads settled to press together. In the midst of their animalistic desperation to rip each other’s clothes off and failing to completely dress, they seemed to be in the eye of the storm as their warm breaths brushed against one another. Suddenly the raging urge to tackle each other dissipated and was replaced with a soothed need to just be in each other’s space. Kensei settled down, letting some of his weight rest against the teenager’s front. Hisagi in turn settled with wrapping one arm around the Captain’s waist while the other started to make quick work of readjusting the pillow so he had somewhere proper to rest his head.  
  
“....we…just...” Hisagi whispered and broke the silence only to go deadly quiet. Some moments were better left without any spoken dialogue. Kensei registered the teenager's weak attempt to speak and instead of responding with a breathless word of his own, he rolled onto his side and gently tugged Shuhei closer, allowing their bodies to rest up against each other once more. There was so much rushing through Kensei’s mind, but either way even with all the unsureness, he felt oddly content. He wasn’t perfect and no one would ever catch him saying he was. But being here with Hisagi in his life...well….the boy felt like a missing part of him, as silly as that sounded. In this way, perhaps together they were perfect.  
  
By this time, both of their breathing had settled, leaving the room to be completely vacant of any soft sounds. The Captain broke the silence though when he reached out to gently run his hand along the teenager’s back, he started tenderly rubbing the sore muscles he felt underneath his fingertips. Hisagi wasn’t tense, and yet he felt so rigid from all the overworked muscles packed into his slender form. After a moment Hisagi shifted to pull the fabric covering him off down to his waist only to lay back down, resting his head on Kensei’s forearm and silently tugging on his mentor’s other hand. Seemed someone had been enjoying the attempted massage and back rubs. That being all the consent he needed to continue, the older of the two men went back to gently rubbing any sore spots he came across.   
  
Hisagi’s heart was beating so wildly and was threatening to jump right out his chest just from feeling that warm against his skin. It wasn’t the first time they had touched, there had been passing brushes of hands or the kiss from just a moment ago. But he had never let someone touch him in a fashion that was arguably intimate. A simple back rub it might be, but it was a sentence that suggested more was to come in the future. Originally Shuhei had seen Kensei as a hero to be idolized, and then upon meeting him, Hisagi had grown to view him as a mentor. And now...after he’d seen the other sides of the Captain, he knew there was more than what meets the eye. There was something alluring about seeing more hidden parts of the Captain, but either way, Shuhei realized it wasn’t so black and white anymore. Everything he had learned about the Captain had led to this moment in time. He wasn’t lying beside the Captain because he just respected and admired him. He was here of his own free will because deep down he truly did care and wanted to be an intimate part of the Captain’s life. Considering the man was residing in his futon, it seemed he wasn’t the only one wishing for that.  
  
“Oi, kid. I can hear your gears turning wildly in that head of yours.” Kensei whispered, his voice a soft rasp. “Sleep, alright? We can talk in the morning.” He needed this to be more than just a one night stand, but whatever Hisagi wanted, he’d give it. There were pressing issues to deal with later, like the fact that he was a Captain and this could be seen as an abuse of power and Hisagi was still just a student…  
  
“....” Hisagi didn’t respond right away only to mumble drowsily, “Only if you continue with the back rubs.”  
  
“Heh, one taste of me and already growing this cocky ordering me about, huh?” The older man teased only to nod and press a butterfly light kiss to the back of Hisagi’s throat. “Yeah, I’ll keep it up until I pass out as well. So close those pretty eyes and start counting sheep.”  
  
 _He thought his eyes were pretty, hmm?_ Shuhei chuckled, eyes rolling at the sheep comment but Kensei was making a good suggestion, one that he would side with for the time being. Letting his eyelids flutter shut, Hisagi slowly drifted off to unconsciousness while still wrapped in the Captain’s embrace.  
  


* * *

  
  
 **_“Oi, oi…!” Kazeshini yelled, looking more than just a little pissed off when Shuhei made his grand entrance into his inner world. The poor zanpakuto had hurryingly thrown his popcorn under his pillow and yanked closed the curtains that hid the windows that acted as a broadcast of whatever Shuhei was seeing. It seemed that Kazeshini had been enjoying the show until it ended so soon. Who knew that he was a bit of a fangirl, even with all his rough edges and crudeness? Now, normally if his master showed his face here, it was because his Zanpakuto was looking for a good fight, but this wasn’t the case this time around. Hisagi knew that if he was going to continue being as open and put together for the Captain of the Ninth, he needed to face his fears head on._ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“Kazeshini.” Shuhei uttered so softly, that the mentioned zanpakuto's ears had to twitch up to hear him more clearly._ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“The fuck do ya need of all freaking times-”_ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“Let’s talk.”_ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“Jeez….” Kazeshini hesitated only to watch wide eyed as Hisagi’s lips formed into a small smile and suddenly an outreached hand was offered towards him. “It’s about time we get to know each other better, don’t you think?”_ **

**_“...Heh, now yer talkin’ my language. Don’t expect me to go easy on ya.”_ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“You’re my zanpakuto. I wouldn’t expect any less.”_ ** **_  
_** **_  
_** **_“.....REAP-!”_ ** **_  
_****_  
______________  
  
  
_ ** Sleep wasn’t as easy for the Captain to come by. What they had just done had crossed so many boundaries of their lives and respected closeness, that he doubted there was any way of turning back from this. Not that he wished for that. He was still unsure if this was the right path for Shuhei to be with someone like him, but he should at least wait for the morning before making such assumptions. Resting beside Shuhei was more important right now. He could worry later about what the morning would bring.  
  
The Captain sighed at the thought and pressed a tender kiss to the back of Hisagi’s throat.  
  
 _He almost didn’t want the sun to come up again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say that this was by far one of the hardest chapters of this work for me to write. Sorry if it feels a little rushed, I tried really hard to prevent that but AAAH this was so hard to write! I hope you all like it at least!


	7. Facing Inner Demons

Massaging his face and letting his eyes flicker open for a second, Kensei started to register that the sun had definitely risen already. Swallowing awkwardly and coughing a little at just how dry and unused his throat felt, the Captain rolled onto his back. He blindly patted the side of the bed to feel for Shuhei’s body, but after a good moment or two of fumbling about, it was becoming obvious that the kid wasn’t beside him. Cursing softly, he sat up and reopened his eyes and slowly adjusted to the light coming from the window.  
  
 _Where was he?? Oh wait...that’s right he was at Shuhei’s quarters._  
  
Rubbing at his temple once more as he felt a headache already starting to form, Kensei suddenly paused in his motions when he heard some clambering about in the next room over. Fixing his clothes for the most part and making a note to find his haori plus gloves later, the Captain strolled cautiously into the other room only to find Shuhei in front of a mirror. The kid seemed well rested….well as well rested as someone who’d barely survived a hollow attack could be.  
  
“Kid?” Kensei croaked out, only to mentally groan. So much for trying not to sound like he’d suck a cock or something. Damn mornings honestly. Once he tested the waters and figured first what Shuhei was so adamantly trying to do and if they were a thing, he’d grab something to wet his dry throat. A lot more talking was probably going to leave him feeling as dry as a desert.  
  
Shuhei immediately stiffened at hearing his name and tightened his grip on the edge of the sink as he continued to stare into his own eye. The bandages covering the injured side of his face had come undone partly from sleeping and had a few dried blood spots, but that was to be expected. However, Hisagi normally didn’t face himself in the mirror when he did it. He knew it was stupid, to act as if he was scared of his own shadow but looking upon his scars would mean having to come to terms with the deaths of some of his fellow students that had been under his supervised care. Clenching so tightly that his nails threatened to break from scrapping so much against the tiles of the sink, Shuhei couldn’t seem to ease up even with the presence of his mentor.  
  
“Morning…” Hisagi finally uttered weakly and bowed his head finally, refusing to turn around and face the Captain, but rather glare dead on the sink. He knew that all this stiffness and standoffish would probably be read wrong by the Captain, but he didn’t have the heart at the moment to care. He might have been released from the Fourth Division, but that didn’t mean his inner demons had vanished without a trace. If anything it felt as if the battle of dealing with this mess had only just started. It was easier fighting with his bare hands, rather than something not physical. 

“I know that look.” Kensei suddenly murmured quietly, not stepping forward, but not stepping backward either. “That’s the same expression my men give whenever they’ve been through hell and back.”  
  
“I’m still in the hell part though.” Hisagi whispered. “I...I still feel guilty. My brain feels clogged and blocked up...I can’t remember everything that happened, but I still am aware that I failed. That doesn’t mean that I’m going to refuse to join your division but,”  
  
Kensei raised an eyebrow. “But you’ll just walk around and act like nothing happened? That’s not a healthy move, Shu. You might as well just bottle it all up and forget the rest of your memories of that night.” He sighed and finally stepped forward, taking his time even though they were only a few steps away from each other. 

“In time you’ll remember. But while your mind heals, you need to catch up in the meantime and concentrate on what you can work on right now.”  
  
“I know...but…” Hisagi swallowed his saliva and looked up to gaze at Kensei through the mirror. “It’s nerve wracking.”  
  
“No surprise there. Look, Shu...you know as well as I do what you need to do.” Kensei whispered, making the hairs on the back of Hisagi’s neck stand up from feeling the Captain’s breath of air. The older man’s presence was definitely wanted, but the needed pressure he was providing was well...annoying. But Kensei was so right. 

“H...Help me then?” Shuhei finally whispered with the parting of his lips and felt a shudder run through his form when Kensei’s chest pressed supportively against his back. _There was that oh so familiar, comforting heat that he needed…_ _  
__  
_“Yeah...just keep your eyes on the mirror.” Kensei uttered, his voice just as hushed. The air didn’t feel tense, but strangely enough the space they were in suddenly had a sort of sacred vibe to it. Essentially holding Shuhei’s hand through the dark of his mind left Kensei feeling more trusted than ever, and the thought of it all left the Captain nearly crippling at the knees. He cared so damn much for this brat, so whether it took months or years for Shuhei to remember who exactly did this to him, Kensei would pursue all the leads. The first bastard to cross examine would be the four-eyes lieutenant. He could smell bullshit from someone coming a mile away, and Aizen reeked of it.

Wiping his mind clean and concentrating on the moment, Kensei kept his eyes locked on Shuhei as he slowly unraveled the bandages. It felt like years had passed before all the used wrappings were off Hisagi’s face. The first the student registered was the cloudiness of his injured iris. Then he spotted the redness of his sclera. To put it bluntly, his eye looked like a mess. It hurt a little to see out of it, but he knew right away that he wouldn’t be able to see quite the same with that eye ever again.

“If you’re worried about the scars...the Fourth said they have the ability to hide the damaged tissue.” Kensei added after all the awkward silence.  
  
Shuhei didn’t respond right away and reached up with shaky fingertips to run them down his three scars. Those kinds of scars could be healed but-....Making up his mind, he was quick to speak before the Captain could get another word in and possibly make a fool of himself. “You’re right. I can’t just forget this all happened...I’m keeping the scars.”  
  
The Captain immediately was caught off guard by that exclamation. “To torture yourself with the past?”  
  
“No, to learn from it.” Shuhei finally turned around and cracked a small smile. “I’m a slow learner Captain, but I think I’m finally getting the hang of what it means to be a soul reaper. Sacrifice is to be expected and while some damage can be overcome, it less about putting the pieces back together but rather working with what you have.”  
  
Kensei could only reach out in awe and gently cup the side of Shuhei’s face that wasn’t injured. He watched tenderly as Hisagi kept his eyes locked on his but leaned into the touch before turning so he could press a butterfly light kiss to the Captain’s ungloved palm.  
  
“I don’t want to run away from anything Captain. I’ll face it all.”  
  
“Not alone you will.” The addressed Captain uttered and caused them both to smile in unison.  
  
“Not alone, since I’ve got you right?”  
  
“Damn straight.”  
  
 _Well, that cleared things up. Time to start a new chapter of their lives...together this time around._ _  
_

* * *

  
  
“.....What do I want to say, hmm?” Aizen sat prestigiously on a chair that was as always placed above the rest. He might not yet be a ruler in his own right, but he still demanded to be treated like one. Resting his chin against his palm, he stared down expectantly at Gin. This boy that he’d taken under his wing was already failing him. And after all that, they had accomplished already. Shame, maybe he should just get rid of him?  
  
“That I failed you Aizen-sama.”  
  
“Good boy.” Aizen uttered humorously, but they both knew behind that smiling mask of an expression he wore, Aizen was beyond kindness. Cruelty, torture, plotting and toying was what he knew best and might as well consume for all the recommended meals of the day. “You’re fortunate that Shuhei Hisagi still seems unable to recall what happened. But Gin…” Aizen held out his hand, silently ordering the snake of a child to step forward. The boy did just that only to hiss when his face was gripped tightly in Aizen’s hand. “If I catch even a whiff that he is starting to remember, not only will his life be at stake, but yours as well. Now, show that you understand.” Voice low, Aizen’s eyes seemed to peer into Gin’s very soul and that sure did shake his inner foundations. But he had to continue...he had to do this for her...only for her.  
  
“I understand Aizen-sama.” It was a little hard to speak with his face being gripped so tightly, but there was no saying no to the man before him. It was almost dazzling how great Aizen’s spiritual pressure was when he was this angry. But the current lieutenant always found ways to take his frustration on Gin, whether that was physically or mentally. Gin always got through it all, after all that cunning smirk of his was a permanent scar etched onto his face. It wasn’t a representation of his feelings but rather of the walls he had built around himself. A child he might be in a way, but violence always harden anyone up, whether adult or child.  
  
“Good. Off you go. Tell Tousen while you’re at it to come here. I’m in need of his presence.” Aizen released Gin’s face and briskly brushed him away, already tiring of the boy. Gin might have caught his eye in the beginning, but this Shuhei Hisagi was proving to be far more interesting and worth melding into his own. But in the meantime, he’d settle for playing with Tousen.  
  
______  
  
  
Once the door had closed behind him, Gin smirked a little wider and told a waiting Tousen that he’d been called for. It wasn’t until he’d heard the door click closed behind Tousen that he suddenly started into a run. He needed to escape somehow, to have a moment to let those walls cave in so he could just release all of his pain. Panting softly, Gin kept charging forward only for his eyes to widen rapidly when a pair of arms wrapped around him and seemed to catch him right before he might have tripped over a stack of papers in the middle of the hallway.  
  
“Ah, easy there…” Kira muttered softly, still holding Gin raised above the floor. He might just be a teenager, but Gin was still older than him. The height difference was the only thing that caused others to assume Gin was much younger. “Ah, let me put you down.” Kira eased Gin down onto his feet before pausing. “So um…”  
  
“.......Do you always try to capture people?” Gin found himself uttering teasingly and watched as Kira blushed in embarrassment. “H-Hey you were running like someone was chasing after you and well, I didn’t want you to start tripping..um sir!” Kira grumbled only to turn when Renji came behind and yelled for Kira to catch up. They had a bar to visit later after all!  
  
“Ah, have a good day!” Kira called out and only as he left did Gin managed to catch a glimpse of those eyes hidden by those long blond bangs. …. _That boy...was intriguing._ Best to keep that thought to himself though. If Aizen sensed it, well….best not to even think of it.


	8. Start of the Day

Shuhei never would have expected the Captain of the Ninth would ever be laying in his bed, warming his blankets and cuddling the hell out of him. But here they were all tangled up under the sheets. Groaning quietly and giving a good stretch, the student tried to roll onto his side, but those arms caging him against Kensei’s chest were making that nearly impossible. There were windows in Shuhei’s room, thankfully though barely any light streams in.    
  
“Quit wiggling.” A rumbled grumble made itself known. Seemed someone didn’t want to wake up right away when the bed was so cozy.    
  
**_“Kick him.”_ ** Kazeshini uttered from the teenager’s inner world.  **_“That’ll wake the old man up even more.”_ ** His master was keen on ignoring that. He didn’t have the energy to juggle two different conversations at once.    
  
“I need to get up though.” Shuhei mumbled, only to shiver when after sticking his hands out from under the blankets, the cold seeped into his body. Okay, he took that back, staying in bed was a really good idea. Reverting back into the earlier position that they’d been in, Shuhei buried his face in Kensei’s hair, enjoying how the older male hugged his chest, using it as a pillow of sorts.    
  
The soft snicker from the Captain confirmed he found Shuhei’s change of opinion as amusing.    
  
“Nn...you’re the worst.” It was childish of Shuhei to grumble like that, but he couldn’t help himself. There was no way he was going to let that snicker go away without being addressed.    
  
“I’m the worst, huh? Sure about that, kid?” Muguruma shifted and before Hisagi had a chance to complain, he lifted the teenager’s shirt up and moved so as to give the porcelain skin there a nip for good measure.    
  
“H-Hey, you can’t just-” The shinigami student stammered, only for his cheeks blossom into a dark flush when he caught sight of his lover. Shivering, he watched as those dark, lustful eyes locked onto him. There was no more drowsiness lingering in that gaze it seemed.    
  
From Kensei’s perspective, he could finally see more than just an outline. Shuhei was gorgeous. His own gaze takes its time inspecting each inch of the other's body. Unmarked porcelain perfection, not a single hair out of place or love bites marking the skin. Kensei itched to change that.    
  
But Hisagi beat him to it. Biting down on the Captain’s throat, he left a bruising mark before quickly squirming out of bed before he could be stopped. For a second Muguruma looked about ready to chase after the student, but Hisagi immediately grumbled, “I have class in less than an hour. Don’t join me in the shower, or I seriously will kick your balls one of these days.”    
  
That made Kensei back off quick from the potential hunt of his intended prey. Rubbing the sore spot on his throat, he dropped back against the pillows, enjoying what warmth had been retained after Shuhei had wiggled his way free. There was something to be said about how nice it felt to just lay here while listening to the faint sounds of water running in the bathroom. It was...rather peaceful, a word that the Captain wasn’t one for using, but it fit so perfectly in this moment. He just hoped it would stay this way.    
  
One glance at the time made him sit up with a disgruntled groan. Giving his back a slight stretch, he made a small face at the sounds of bones cracking. Kami, he was getting old if his back was already aching this much this early in the morning. “Oi, kid!” Kensei called out, getting up and giving a tap to the bathroom door. “I’m heading out, okay?” Hearing no response and figuring it just meant Shuhei was in the middle of humming and hadn’t heard him because of the noise of the water raining down on him, he walked back over to the bed, snatching up his earlier discarded haori. He knew the brat enjoyed using it like some blanket, but he seriously needed it if he wanted to look presentable as the Captain of the Ninth.    
  
Giving himself a good look in the reflection of the window, Kensei nodded curtly. Yup, all good. He didn’t look like he’d been cuddling like a teddy bear all night. When he turned on his heel, he didn’t expect to get tackled by a wet teenager enveloped in a towel. “Wait, I forgot-” Shuhei leaned up on his tippy toes and pecked Kensei’s lips before pulling back to grin like an idiot. “Morning kiss.”    
  
“Cheesy brat.” Kensei scoffed but quickly rewarded Shuhei with a brush of lips against his temples and then his scars. Hisagi didn’t even flinch when his scars were touched. Process finally. In the wake of getting his injuries, Shuhei had always been understandably touchy there. “Study hard today, got it?” It was freaking adorable how Hisagi looked gitty with pleasure at getting the affection returned.    
  
“Nn...I always do.”    
  
“Sure.” Kensei snickered and playfully nipped Hisagi’s bottom lip before he was pushed away towards the door. “Ugh, out!” Hisagi huffed, but he didn’t look annoyed in the slightest, considering he was still smiling. A grin Kensei matched when he headed out. The door closed with a click behind him, and soon enough Hisagi returned to the bathroom to finish up his shower. He rushed, but did end up reaching class in time.    
  
\-----    
  
Tousen stayed still behind his desk, listening as the clock it ticked away. His Captain was becoming increasingly late nowadays, and he has a good reason as to why. It had to do with that shinigami student that he’d been seeing around more and more. But times would change. Aizen-sama would let him use the teenager in the way he wished when their plan went through.    
  
Aizen-sama had made his promise...and he knew that in the new world that they would create, that he would get his rewards for his good behavior. He just needed to bite his tongue and bide his time. Soon all would fall into place.    
  



	9. Something In The Air

“I’ve been requested by the Fifth to give a statement of what occurred.” Was the first sentence past Shuhei’s lips that morning. There hadn’t even been a good morning uttered but Kensei hadn't pushed it when clearly now wasn’t the time. He’d seen that clouded look earlier, and knew he’d have to bide his time before the boy would unleash his inner demons.  
  
“Did they specify why the Fifth?” Kensei took a bite of his breakfast. Strange, but he’d hear what the kid had to say to that.  
  
“No.” Shuhei mumbled, eyes dropping to eye the tea within his mug. The quietness brought on by that left the teenager feeling uneasy, and he tried to hide it by running his finger along the rim. “I asked them why, but the Fourth pretty much expressed that it was none of my concern.”  
  
“Hn…” That got the Captain thinking. _Why the hell was the Fifth always reappearing?_ Those weird brushes with that freakin’ four-eyed Lieutenant were making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up just from the thought of it.  
  
Hisagi was starting to give him a strange look. He was probably accidentally glaring for all Kensei knew. Time to mask it away with, “You feel comfortable to go and make a statement? If you’re not ready for it, I can pull some strings.”  
  
Sweet of the Captain, but no. As much as the teenager wanted to depend on Kensei all over again was there, he couldn’t always lean on him for support. If he wanted to catch up to the Captain and feel like he was at the same level of his boyfriend, he needed to continue to grow up. Sucking in a breath, Shuhei’s free hand balled up into a fist. “I appreciate it, but it’s something I need to get over with sooner rather than later. I don’t want this to keep weighing me down…”  
  
“Looks like you’ve made up your mind then, Shu.” Quietly studying the fidgeting teenager, Kensei tried to shove aside his growing concern. His gut instinct was screaming at him that something wasn’t adding up, but again...he was probably overreacting-  
  
 **“I doubt you’re overreacting master. I feel the same sensation. Rather unpleasant if I may say.”**

Of course Tachikaze felt the need to insert his own opinion. Ignoring the comment for a later time, Kensei set aside his empty bowl before standing up to lean over the table and give that head of black hair a ruffle. “If you don’t have classes after your visit to the Fifth, come by the Ninth. Okay?”  
  
In the middle of grumbling and fixing up his hair that had just been messed up, Shuhei gave a nod only to yelp when the Captain cupped his face, giving those cheeks a light squeeze. “Oi, quit fussing about your hair...I swear…”  
  
“It was perfectly styled before you-!”  
  
“Oh? I?” The Captain’s lips curled into a demonic grin. “Before I did this?” He released Hisagi’s face to give another ruffle to his hair which only caused more whining. “Captain-!” 

As much as Kensei was enjoying messing with Shuhei, a quick glance at the time made it well known that he had a job to do. They both had places to be. “Enough with the whining, okay? I’ll buy you some of that weird gel shit you use.”  
  
A glare.  
  
“.....I’ll buy you two of them.”  
  
Finally Shu’s eyes softened at that. Thank heavens Kensei knew the right things to say occasionally. “You don’t have to actually.” Leaning up, Hisagi brushed his lips against his boyfriend’s. Always a good trick to use when he wanted to silence the older man. “But thanks for the thought.” Hisagi added once he pulled back to break the kiss. “I’m off.”  
  
Giving a nod, Kensei finished the rest of tea. But something made him pause after drinking up the last of the cup’s contents. Today felt weird, and Tachkaze was probably feeling it as well. Which meant…  
  
“Oi, Shu…?”   
  
The student soul reaper already had one foot out of the door, but luckily he paused and glanced back. “Yeah?”  
  
“I love you.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
 _“I love you.”_ _  
__  
_The words echoed over and over again, pounding Shuhei with the information as he hurried over for his morning classes. He hadn’t been able to respond, just swallowed the saliva that had formed in his mouth and ran off. The best he gave Kensei in reply was a small smile. A bit rushed at best, but he’d been so thrown off, and lacking any preparedness.  
  
Shuhei just hoped Kensei wouldn’t take his running off as a bad sign. Kazeshini of course had to snicker at that which didn’t help Hisagi convince himself even further. Great, now he was in some messy business. They had only cuddled and kissed! And some back scratches when he was fortunate enough to get one. Those always had him purring like a cat.  
  
 **“Feeling each other up too like a bunch of nervous schoolgirls.”** Kazeshini crackled, gleefully mocking Shuhei from his inner world. **“Oh, Kensei~~~~ Right there~~~A little higher~~”**  
  
“Shut it.” Hisagi hissed under his breath, soft enough that none of his fellow students walking past him in the hallways would catch on to it. He already had rumors swirling around ever since he got injured. Most of his fellow students wouldn’t even look him in the eye. How could they? Some blamed him, he was sure of it. Others probably pitied him and he didn’t know which was worse. If Kensei got a wift of even one rumor that would probably just be more problematic for Shuhei. The man already had so much on his hands with running his division. And Hisagi didn’t care what others thought. Obvious statement considering that he wore a massive 69 tattoo on his cheek. That always just begged attention.  
  
 **“Make me.”** A cocky bastard, Kazeshini knew exactly that Hisagi couldn’t.  
  
Sitting down into his chair and ignoring the look of disapproval from the teacher for being a few minutes late, Shuhei released a long breath, trying to cool his mind and wipe the slate clean. Now was class time, and he has some notes to take.  
  


* * *

  
Kensei didn’t regret shit. Yes, pronouncing loving comments was probably hurrying the relationship, but it felt right to do it then. It almost felt like if he hadn’t, he wouldn’t have that chance for a long time. Weird, but he’d rather do it now than be sorry. The kid was probably freaking internally, but he could put out those fires when he picked Shuhei up for dinner.  
  
 **“Is it possible we are overreacting?”** Tachikaze’s voice flooded into the Captain of the Ninth’s mind, making him think twice. Had he? Or rather they? **“I only say that, since perhaps we were more heavily impacted by Hisagi-san getting injured.”** **  
****  
**“Clarify.” Not that Kensei usually liked to get into long, deep conversations about himself or his actions, but he was gonna give Tachikaze the change to explain in more depth. Tch, look at him being a good master. This alone deserved a pat on the back.  
  
 **“We presume that Hisagi-san is always in danger when in reality, he’s not. We are projecting our fears that** **_were_ ** **very real weeks ago.”** **  
****  
**“Che, maybe.” A sound in thought, led with a look of annoyance when he spotted some Ninth soul reapers slacking around. One of the benefits of being Captain was he barely had to acknowledge the existence of passerbyers that were always so quick to bow and wish him good morning. The best he ever afforded them was a ‘hmm’. Unless of course, they were wasting their own division’s time.  
  
Snapping at them, Kensei returned his attention to Tachikaze. "So, you’re telling me to just ignore my gut instinct that something isn’t right?”  
  
 **“....Not exactly Master. I merely suggest that while I believe something is afoot, I doubt Hisagi-san is in danger again.”** **  
**“Tch, you’re playing this too nicely. Something’s wrong, so how can I not be concerned? It’s not just about us now.” **  
****  
****“You’re being overly cautious.”** **  
****  
**Stuck with that lingering sentence for some food for thought, Kensei reached his office and headed straight to his desk even when the officers of his division quickly stood up and wished him good morning. Kami, they really needed to try some new phrases, that didn’t always include, ‘good morning.’  
  
“Captain, I have readied the paperwork in order on your desk. If you could please sign it all, and then a visit to the editing department to check on the latest edition of Seireitei news magazine that we have scheduled for release on time tomorrow.” Tousen murmured, already having approached the Captain before he had a moment to breath and get a feel of his surroundings. “By then we should have all the reports from the divisions of Gotei 13, and can review them.”  
  
“Anything else you gonna throw at me?” Kensei groaned, already hating where this was all going. Before he’d ever become Captain, he’d just always presumed that Captains had all the fun which meant no paperwork. But go figure he has Mashiro for a lieutenant who acts as though she’s allergic to signing papers. At least she was good at training the men. Because come on, she had to be good at something for him to still keep her around.  
  
“One more thing sir.” Tousen flipped through the papers attached to his clipboard. “We’ve been giving orders for a mission to take place tomorrow.”  
  
“....you tell me this now!?”  
  
“Sir, I understand the timing is not as desired, but orders from the Head Captain are not to be disobeyed.” Even as Tousen said it, he had to remind himself to not act on the rising feeling of happiness in his chest. Aizen-sama was right, they needed to kick their plans faster into action now that the Captain of the Ninth suspected misconduct, and that Hisagi-san was regaining his memories, soon if not already now.  
  
If they wanted to take control of the divisions as they had discussed, plans had to be tweaked. There would be blood spilled tonight, and souls captured. And there was no way either Hisagi or Kensei would see it coming.  
  
The righteous world he planned to create with Aizen-sama was so close, and Tousen could almost taste it in the air. Though he had to be careful that he didn’t grow arrogant or irrational just yet. A pure soul like him wouldn’t fall too far from grace just yet. She wouldn’t like that, but no need to fret.  
  
Tousen’s lips settled into a faint smile.  
  
She might not have become a shinigami, but he would keep his former friend’s memory close and bring into being a world without bloodshed. Sadly, to get to that point some lives would be lost for the cause, but that’s where Aizen’s lack of remorse for loss of life would come in handy.  
  
 _Justice without a great cause begets nothing more than slaughter. However, that same slaughter in the name of a great cause is justice._ _  
__  
__\----_ _  
__  
_Trying to regulate his anger before he took it all out on the nearest of the soul reapers, Kensei braced his hands against his temple. Sucking in a deep breath and then releasing it, he finally started giving out some orders. “Have the men gather supplies. Ensure the paperwork is completed by then. Mashiro will be joining us, so make sure she brings her ass along tomorrow. We’ll tend to the disturbances, and should have the mission over in a few days.”  
  
“Understand sir.” Following orders, the Fifth seat gave a small bow.  
  
“Last thing, have the men ready in the morning. We set out at early light.”  
  
“Hai.” _  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I believe that Tousen's female friend is never named. So I didn't name her. Also, hint see where this is going? I'm trying to stay close to the canon story!


	10. When All Is Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuhei is interviewed by Aizen about the events of the attack that killed many of his fellow students. Kensei sets off on his division's assigned mission. Neither predicts the evening's changes.

Shuhei hated how he could hear his heart beating rapidly. He wouldn’t be surprised if his heart jumped out of his chest and right onto the floor. He hated this already. The room he’d been put into smelt like a hospital somehow, and kami did he detest that scent. His brain was sounding alarms, but he did his best to ignore it all when he heard the door open.   
  
“Ah, Hisagi-san you came.” Making his entrance, Aizen quietly slid the door shut behind him and walked over to sit across from the soul reaper student. Setting aside a binder, and crossing his hands, Aizen’s eyes scanned over the younger male.    
  
“You asked me to come.” Hisagi grumbled, his displeasure at having to do this shining right through his voice and causing him to slouch.    
  
“So I did. But you understand why, I presume?” Aizen opened the binder in front of him, mindlessly tapping his fingers against the pages inside. Waiting for the response he had asked of, he adjusted his glasses, pushing them further up the bridge of his nose.    
  
“Yes, you need a statement from me.” Hisagi mumbled, letting his hands drop to his lap. He tried not to squirm under that daggerish gaze.    
  
“..Tell me from the start what you remember Hisagi-san. I will be taking notes.” Aizen ordered, already reaching for his pen. The notes would actually be of no use to him, but it was all a mask to what really was the purpose of being here.    
  
“I was on a mission. I had fellow students with me, and…”    
  
“And?”    
  
“Hollows came out of nowhere. I..I mean I expected hollows since that was the goal of the mission to track them down and have the students gain experience killing them, but the amount of hollows was...it was just weird.” Shuhei stammered, rubbing the back of his neck. It felt like a major headache was coming, but he ignored it for now.    
  
“Hisagi-san, what do you remember after that?”    
  
“I...I...i-it’s blurry.”    
  
That made Aizen’s pen stutter to a stop. This was a good sign that the student was struggling to remember, because the memories had been tested. “Try again.” He breathed, testing how good Gin’s attempts to wipe Hisagi’s memories had been.    
  
“...T-There was just blood everywhere and…” Shuhei gripped the edge of the desk, fingers nearly going white from how hard he pressed against the wood. Recalling what had happened was proving to be a greater challenge than he’d expected. He almost wished it was Kensei’s hand he was gripping onto instead of the table that lacked any ability to soothe his nerves.    
  
“...I see, that will be enough for today Hisagi-san. You’re dismissed.”    
  
“You don’t want to hear more?”  _ This wasn’t right. This was way too abrupt. Why did it feel like this was all being purposely rushed? No...that had to be a part of his imagination, right?  _   
  
“There’s no need. You were injured and that was it as we have determined through you first witness testimony. Correct?” Aizen pushed his glasses back up against the bridge of his nose.    
  
“Well...yes…” Stumbling to his feet, Hisagi shuddered.  _ No, there had been something else. Faces...that he could remember. And they had said something to him. What had they said though? Kazeshini said something, but what was done after that?  _   
  
Why did it feel like the Lieutenant knew exactly what was going, and yet still wanted to end this?    
  
“Off you go Hisagi-san...and let's leave this all in the past shall we? We wouldn’t want this to reflect poorly on your education.”    
  
“Y-Yes…” Fuck, if he ever became a  lieutenant , he never wanted to be as creepy as Aizen, or drop poorly veiled threats to his schooling.   
  
Getting out as quickly as possible, Shuhei made sure to head straight for the ninth division where he knew he’d feel most at ease. At least there he could feel more comfortable and have Kensei listen to his worries.    
  
Strangely Kazeshini was too quiet for his own good.    
  
  
  
__________    
  
  
  
  
“...So?” Hisagi had to fight back the urge to snap his fingers in front of the Captain’s face to grab his attention. Sure the work the soul reaper dealt with could be a bit much after a while, but enough to make Kensei stare into space? Wow, he really was seeing a new side. This wasn’t what he expected after returning to the Ninth division after that bizarre back and forth with Aizen.    
  
“Huh?” Blinking out of the hazy state he’d been fixed in, Kensei finally grew alert and sat up straighter. “Ah, back already kid? That was fast.”    
  
“...I was gone for a few hours...everything okay?”    
  
Course that wasn’t perhaps the best thing to ask since Kensei immediately looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Like to get straight to the elephant in the room, eh?”    
  
“Kinda hard not to when you look like crap.” Shuhei cheekily said in turn.    
  
“Yeah, well we’ve got another mission coming up tomorrow. Way sooner than I expected and let's just say its weird timing. Something's happening, I can feel it in my bones-” Kensei paused when Hisagi held a hand up.    
  
“Stop right there. Saying, ‘feel it in my bones’, makes you sound old. That’s 101 basic knowledge.”    
  
“Che, listen kid, you tryin’ to make me blow you away?”  _ ( /// Kensei's Shikai has the command ‘Blow it Away’ /// )  _ _  
_   
“Not that kind of blow.” Shuhei’s lips curled upwards. “Like blow m-” 

Now it was Kensei’s turn to hold up a hand. Damn brat definitely had been influenced by the wrong crowd and on top of that, was growing more confident with expressing what he actually wanted. Not a bad thing, but it still managed to always surprise the Captain.    
  
“Alright, we’re going to stop right there before your hormones take the reins and start talking. Grab your shift, we’re heading out to eat, and then you,” He pointed after pushing his chair back, “Are going back to your dorm.”    
  
“But, when will I see you again?” Missions were the norm in Soul Society, but considering the weirdness of the entire situation it only made sense that Hisagi would want some idea of when this was all going to be over and done with.    
  
“...I don’t know kid. But jeez, get that pitiful look off your face.” Grabbing Shuhei by the collar, he brushed their noses together before pressing a fond kiss to the student’s temple and then those three ragged scars that he’d grown to be especially fond of. “I always come back don’t I?”    
  
“Yeah, but…” Shuhei grumbled, rubbing his own arm. “It feels like I’m seeing you less and less and...it’s just...y’know lonely sometimes.” Feeling defeated in a way, he dropped his head to rest against the familiar 69 chest tattoo. “You’ll come back.” A whisper, a reconfirmation for his own sake. “You have to come back.” He added raggedly, only to sruge up and lock their lips together again, running his tongue along the older male’s bottom lip for good measure. Shuhei  _ needed _ his boyfriend to understand that.    
  
“Always do, Shu.” Kensei breathed, nipping at that pink tongue that licked at him, then more forcefully claiming those lips. His only other free hand entwined with that artfully messy hair. The digits messaged and tugged gently, working the student’s scalp in delicious ways. Kensei could try to figure out later why Hisagi was so on edge more so than usual.    
  
“Mmnn...K-Kensei air…” Shuhei choked out, breaking their connection apart when his lungs started to ache too much, screaming for air. But that didn’t mean he pulled apart from those arms. “Ha...ha...Kensei, it’s bad timing, but I love you too.”    
  
“Took a bit.” Kensei teased, giving Hisagi’s cheek a gentle pinch. He figured so, but it really was a relief to finally hear it uttered back to him in turn.    
  
“H-Hey I worked up the courage for that..!”    
  
“You want a medal for your hard work? I’ll give one at the end of the day.” The Captain snickered, loving the rise that got out of his boyfriend. “Now, now before you say something you regret, lets get food.”    
  
“One of these days, I swear…” Shuhei grumbled under his breath but still ran after Kensei who was already several steps ahead of him. “Oi, wait for me!”    
  
____    
  
It probably was a pure miracle that Shuhei managed to awake considering how much a deep sleeper he was. What awoke him was when Kensei started stirring from the futon. After eating, the student had managed to convince the Captain to let him sneak back into the Ninth quarters to spend the night together since they wouldn’t have a chance to do this again anytime soon.    
  
Grumbling when the Captain managed to take the covers with him, Hisagi snatched the blankets up and reburied himself under them, unaware that had alerted his lover that he was awake, not truly sleeping.    
  
“Oi, brat...go back to sleep.” Kensei muttered before leaning over to brush his lips against Hisagi’s temple. “You can stay for another hour or two, but after that-”    
  
“I know, not my first time.” Hisagi mumbled, peering back to cheekily stick out his tongue. “You don’t need to mother me.”    
  
“Yeah, well…” Kensei snickered before tugging at his haori. “You gonna let go of it? It ain't a blanket.”    
  
“Mine.” Hisagi had one truly childish behavior, and that was refusing to give up Kensei’s haoris. Half of the time, the Captain would find all his missing haoris stuffed in hidden places in the student’s dorm room. His clothing bill was going to skyrocket at this point considering how many times he’d just give in and bought a new one.    
  
“Che, last time kid.”    
  
“You said that weeks ago.” Hisagi mumbled, eyelids already shuddering shut once more. Nuzzling the white fabric, his body soaked up the warmth trapped under the blankets and allowed himself to slip back towards sleep. The last thing he registered was a chuckle before another press of lips went against his temple. He didn’t see Kensei’s typical regiment of getting dressed, washing his face to fully awaken himself or him fixing his hair by raking his fingers through the mess of it.    
  
Shuhei didn’t see the turn to catch one last look before heading out. But whether it was because of the growling from Kazeshini, or his growing nervousness for Kensei’s sake, he was kicking off the covers and rushing to get dressed seconds after the Captain left.    
  
_ What the Captain didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.  _   
  
**_“Heh, finally taking my advice?”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “Ssh.” Hisagi mumbled, struggling to perfectly dress up as he stumbled about searching blind in the dark for his shoes. “You’re only encouraging this because you’re looking for an excuse to fight. But we’re not getting involved, got it? We’re just there to-”    
  
**_“Soothe yer moody ass?”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “That’s not exactly how I would describe it.”  
  
  
  
__________  
  
  
  
  
  
The chilliness of the early morning was starting to seep into Hisagi’s skin as he ran out of the Captain’s division, straight down the hallway and right past the other Ninth division member’s quarters. He paid it no mind and instead concentrated on following the right path.   
  
If his calculations were correct, Shuhei would reach the picked camping spot that had been chosen by Kensei by nightfall. Everything was going to be sound, but he needed to confirm that with his own eyes. In and out, quick and easy. No one would even know he’d been trailing Kensei’s top officers, let alone the Captain.    
  
Occasionally when Hisagi felt he was getting too close to the traveling men, he would take a quick breather before following after them. This preceded for the majority of the day, and to the student’s relief the men finally came to a standstill.    
  
Watching from the edge of the forest, Hisagi’s eyes scanned across the tents that had been erected up earlier.  _ Good, everything was as it should be.  _ The sun had started to set, and though now would be the best time to travel back while there was still some light, Shuhei took his time to continue watching over the Ninth division camp.    
  
Hearing Mashiro and Kensei bickering in the distance made him chuckle under his breath. Those two no matter where they were still found time to be at each other throats. Just the thought of it made Hisagi groan and rub at his eyes to try to stay awake.    
  
If only he hadn’t looked down for that second.    
  
Suddenly hearing a scream, Hisagi scrambled to his feet and watched in growing dismay when Kensei and from the looks of it Kasaki charged out of one of the tents. It seemed they had heard the same exact shrilling noise.    
  
**_“Oi, something’s here..!”_ ** Kazeshini seemed on edge, apparent from how he caused the student’s spiritual pressure to spike.  **_“Look, yer pretty boy can handle himself, but we’ve gotta pull back-”_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** “We can’t leave them on their own! Just what is with you!? You’re the same one that agreed with this because you wanted an excuse to fight!” Hisagi bit out only to whirl back around when he heard a screeching sound.    
  
_ Oh god…why was everyone on the ground??  _ _  
_ _  
_ **_“See, idiot!? Ya aren’t any help if ya run down there!”_ ** Cation wasn’t a trademark of Kazeshini, but even he knew something deadly was out there, something that shouldn’t be tested. Raising his voice in Hisagi’s head probably wasn’t the smartest, but he  _ needed _ his master to realize what kind of dangerous situation. This was a replay of the last battle, and it seemed that Shuhei was starting to notice the similarities.    
  
“W..We can’t leave Kensei…” Before Kazeshini could get another word in, Shuhei tore down the hill and straight towards the tents. Already drawing his zanpakuto, Hisagi ducked down to check on the first soul reaper he reached. A quick pat down and check of wrists confirmed his suspicions that there had been an attack on his watch.    
  
Hisagi quickly looked up when he heard a branch break, as if something had stepped on it. There wasn’t anything visible in front of him, but the foreign spiritual pressure building around him was drowning him in it. Even when Shuhei tried straightening up, the sheer force held him down.    
  
A raging wave of sheer pitch blackness coated the sky, so much so Hisagi could barely see even his own palms when he held up his hands up towards the sky. The suddenness of it was overwhelming and soaked into the teenager’s consciousness, forcing forth fears he didn’t even know he had.    
  
Shuhei couldn’t hear the resulting fights, or see the hollow state of Kensei. Instead, he was glued to the dirt, trembling at the littlest of the things, whether a brush of wind against his neck or the sensation of a hand covering his eyes.    
  
Tousen may have seen it as a kindness to hide Shuhei in his bankai, but this was no mercy. This was a sentencing. Might as well hang him instead with Kazeshini’s chains.  


* * *

  
(One Year Later)

  
  
Why did Mother Nature have to hate him so? The rain and darkness cast over Soul Society wasn’t helping to lift his darkened mood. If anything it was building another kind of storm inside of him.    
  
Staring out to the side garden maintained in the Ninth Division for Captain Tousen, Shuhei tried to focus on the sounds of water pattering down onto the ground and into the pond filled with cod, but his attempts were a failure.    
  
He could barely recall the night he followed after the Ninth, but what he did remember in great detail was Tousen sitting beside his hospital bedside. It wasn’t his first interaction with the 5th seat, nor the last. But it was his first time seeing Kensei’s haori on another.    
  
When Tousen notified him that several Captains and Lieutenants were killed, Shuhei felt numb. All he could do was lay there, taking it all in. He’d been there and could have done something if he hadn’t been so weak, or had listened to Kazeshini. It had been utterly foolish to  _ not  _ attack.    
  
There was no way in hell that he’d ever unsheath his blade again. There was something to be feared in an incompetent Zanpakuto.    
  
When Tousen had offered to guide him through his fear and asked him to be his lieutenant, all Shuhei could do was nod weakly. Being asked such a thing had always been a lifelong goal, but only if Kensei was the one to offer it. But, nonetheless Hisagi still accepted. He’d just lost Kensei, he couldn’t lose his division too.    
  
Shuddering at the memory, Shuhei tried to focus on the sounds of the rain pattering against the ground.    
  
With everything that had happened….it sometimes felt like Kensei had only been by his side for a few months at best. As if the former Captain’s relationship with him had been merely a summer fling. Kensei thrust himself into Shuhei’s life, left his mark, captured his love and attention, before leaving him behind. Kensei was gone before they really could have progressed further. The wondrous feelings and emotions the Captain taught him to feel had soured, yet remained locked away in place, all because Hisagi was at fault for being even just the tiniest hopeful deep down. That stupid, little speck of hope made Hisagi fantasize that everything would fall back into place. This chaotic mess would be just like this storm, a set of passing angry clouds. He would finish classes and like always track Kensei in the same office, sitting at the same desk, and always the same greeting.  _ “Hey kid.”  _   
  


They would live the years together. Wake up every morning side by side. Weather the missions and paperwork together. Share arguments, but make up later. The good and the bad times. The highs and lows. All of it would have been a gift to go through together.    
  
Kami...he needed to stop dreaming like a fool. This was a dream that needed to be tossed aside. Captain Tousen was right, leave the past behind. Grow from it. Become strong. Embrace your fears.    
  
“Nn….” Wavering, Shuhei raked his fingers through his hair and bowed his head. He’d always imagined that his life would have been so far different from the current life he was stuck in. Different from the current hell he was stuck in.    
  
“You’re getting stuck in your head too much kid.”    
  
_ No, no no...not the voice. Listening to Kazeshini’s screeches and curses was far better than this cruel tease. If only he and Kazeshini hadn’t alienated each other after the attack.  _ Choking on the sob building in his throat, Shuhei’s hands moved down from his hands to cover his eyes. Somehow that didn’t help one bit, and if anything further projected this sinful lie being cast upon him.    
  
“You haven’t been smiling lately, y’know. Guess always a crybaby, huh?” A soft chuckle. “Well, good thing I seem to have a thing for black haired teary-eyed brats.”    
  
_ He’d heard these words a million times played like a broken record in his head. And yet hearing it now felt as fresh as the many times since the passing of his boyfriend his brain had played the phrases.  _ _  
_ _  
_ “Not much to smile at lately.” Shuhei choked out, his throat tightening up  despite the obvious strain it took. Hisagi was well aware that he was talking to himself and the night. And yet, the urge to go along with the fake conversation was growing, and god...he couldn’t turn Kensei away whether in life or death.    
  
“Yeah?”    
  
“You’re gone. There’s not much to smile knowing that.” Hisagi was feeling sick now, and really would love to puck. If he was home in the privacy of his own quarters, he would have probably allowed his stomach to empty itself. Damn this imaginary Kensei for questioning him. There was nothing, truly to smile about.  Smiles were often demanded by everyone in society. But, never much of a smiler, Shuhei had only really enjoyed the show of expression when around friends, or more importantly Kensei. So how dare this ghost expect him to continue smiling on.    
  
“Find something new to smile about then, kid.”    
  
Shuhei  heaved out a labored breath before he broke into a laugh, and it was quite the cruel sound.  _ Easier said than done.  _ “I don’t need to participate in this conversation any longer.”    
  
“Oh, bullshit. It’s your imagination that started this all and brought me here. Since you can’t forget me, how about playing along?”    
  
“That’s….out of the question. Didn’t you just push me towards smiling for something else?” Shuhei hated how the husky drawl did weird fluttery things still to his stomach. He absolutely loathed how his body managed to conjure up the feathery feel of a hot breath against his throat, and further detested how instinctually he turned into it. Talk about being easy to please.    
  
Of course there was no reply except for the sound of the rain drizzling. Somehow that was okay that his brain had finally taken the easy way out...he didn’t want to be visited anymore tonight by Kensei’s ghost.    
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I really struggled with this chapter. I can't write fight scenes well and even though I've been working on this chapter for ages, I'm still not fully satisfied. I tried to show when Shuhei's fear for Kazeshini developed and how his mentorship of Tousen starts. Because I'm not fully happy with this chapter, I might go in later to clean it up, but the plot of the story won't change at all. 
> 
> But I still hope you guys enjoyed this!!


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